Need Help Getting Help

veirly wrote:Hello there, this is my very first post as I'm new so if i do anything wrong please let me know, thanks.
Anyway, onto the purpose of this post, I'm certain I need to go to a doctor, but I don't know what to do. I've done a lot of research on different disorders, and BPD seems to encompass all my symptoms, but I don't want to self-diagnose myself and want to see an actual doctor for formal treatment.
I'm having trouble asking my mother for help, she is very caring but has never paid much attention to me, it's okay, I'm independent and have other siblings that need her more. However, I think I really need to speak to a professional. I'm really worried as to what she'd say, I don't want to scare her, but my biggest fear is that she'll think I'm doing it for attention.
My younger sister has been diagnosed with OCD and an anxiety disorder, and my older sister just recently got out of the hospital with an iffy diagnosis (not related to mental health), and my father is also set to have several intensive tests for his heart. I'm scared she and other members of my family will think I'm doing this to seem "special", when really all I want is to feel normal. I thought I could wait until I was older and see a doctor myself but I'm still a child and I'm afraid I need help now.
Any advice if greatly appreciated, thank you.

Babygirl8815 wrote:

veirly wrote:Hello there, this is my very first post as I'm new so if i do anything wrong please let me know, thanks.
Anyway, onto the purpose of this post, I'm certain I need to go to a doctor, but I don't know what to do. I've done a lot of research on different disorders, and BPD seems to encompass all my symptoms, but I don't want to self-diagnose myself and want to see an actual doctor for formal treatment.
I'm having trouble asking my mother for help, she is very caring but has never paid much attention to me, it's okay, I'm independent and have other siblings that need her more. However, I think I really need to speak to a professional. I'm really worried as to what she'd say, I don't want to scare her, but my biggest fear is that she'll think I'm doing it for attention.
My younger sister has been diagnosed with OCD and an anxiety disorder, and my older sister just recently got out of the hospital with an iffy diagnosis (not related to mental health), and my father is also set to have several intensive tests for his heart. I'm scared she and other members of my family will think I'm doing this to seem "special", when really all I want is to feel normal. I thought I could wait until I was older and see a doctor myself but I'm still a child and I'm afraid I need help now.
Any advice if greatly appreciated, thank you.

Hi veirly,

Welcome!

Would you mind me asking how old you are and where you live? Meaning the UK, America etc ?

Would determine if or what advice I could maybe give you.

jaus tail wrote:when i was aware that i had some problem, i spoke to the counselor at work place n was recommended to go to a psychiatrist. but i refused, cause
1)i was scared
2)it was expensive
3)i thought i could handle it

but i couldnt. i did something stupid, had a nervous breakdown, and life went complete 360 degrees. now no real life friends. the black n white thinking doesnt go. and it's insane.
had to lose my job
current job is a little more than half the pay but its a mess.

if you're not sure whether you could speak with your mother then it's all right. even for physical ailments people often discuss with friends or doctors than parents.

if you can go to a counselor/therapist/psychiatrist for help then it'd be great but if not then maybe venting it out would help. either to a friend or write it down in a diary or word document and read it later.

the symptoms that i had were:
not getting along with friends...i'd hang out with them but feel out of place...now i realize that friendship doesnt require talking all the time. its about being there for each other.

feeling of unworthy...i used to think i am not worthy for the other person to waste his/her time on me. that they're talking to me out of pity. partly this came cause i would do too much formality n pity on others. now i dont care. its the other person's choice if he/she wants to hang out with me, not for me to make a decision for them.

impulsive actions...i used to spend impulsively n speak impulsively. now i dont. i pass funny remarks but only with friends(online friends are all i have now). i try to stay busy, force myself to read books n stay busy. it's torture at times but strenghtens the mind. i still pass impulsive comments at colleagues but its less than before.

i dont judge others. earlier i used to mock the whole world n make fun. now i dont. i dont have courage to handle the joke so i mustnt also make fun of others.

anger issues...at times its okay to be angry. but often i used to get angry as i thought i'm entitled to stuff. now i think for ten minutes, rehearse the conversation before approaching someone(colleagues mostly)

attention seeking...i wanted to be centre of attention all the time. the limelight must always be on me. i realize it was like child seeking attention from parents all the time. and its all right. even animals do it. i dont care for attention now. instead of wanting the world's attention i'd rather have the attention of one person

boredom...it is not the world's responsibility to entertain me. and i dont have to laugh all the time. like when i used to work out i was serious about it.

superiority...i wanted to be better than the world or at least wanted to build an image that i'm the best. now i dont. i realize these are just adjectives n there's more to life than comparing my life with others. i dont know the pasts of others the struggles they have, so i cant compare their current lives with mine.

i strongly suggest either speak to someone or maybe read a book about the challenges you face. i wish i had come to this forum before.

Echinacea wrote:Hi veirly and welcome to the forum,

Your thoughts have been about your family up to now and that's been very caring and mature of you. when you said "they need her more" that touched my heart.

As ive read, your from US

1) Is your healthcare free until 18yrs ?
2) Do you need your parents permission first? if no - then don't tell them "yet" then you don't have to worry yourself about upsetting them at the moment

if yes to free healthcare without parents consent then i would definitely do it yes, and im really happy to see a 16 year old prepared to finding out whats going on in their mind,behavours etc..and wanting to fix it ..well done

good luck on your journey to finding out your answers

You may even see experiences and tools from here to help you cope/manage while your waiting for an appointment for the professionals - so feel free to look around ok

veirly wrote:You may even see experiences and tools from here to help you cope/manage while your waiting for an appointment for the professionals - so feel free to look around ok