fed up

Well yes they are harsh words. Made ever more harsh if your on the wrong end of them. And they're very easy words to say from my point of view and probably quite hard to read from yours....but they are true.

The main thrust of my point here is that people are all individuals. They are all unique and deserve to treated as individuals, not as Cluster B's or BPD's. Or ADHD like me...for that matter...

You've obviuosly been hurt in the past but that's no reason to come in to a BPD forum and start saying things that may be true...but are totally insensitive...unless your a troll...which I don't think you are....so why bother? We know how BPD's CAN be. We know how it works...we know what it looks like...The last thing people need is a constant reminder of their faults all the time, paticulaly not when they are getting a bit 'Fed Up', which is the name of this thread Starchecker....duh!!! Know what I mean...???

I could go into an ADHD forum and say..."######6 adders...never do what they say they'll do and they're really unreliable..." but that would be a bit point less too, paticulaly if it was in a thread titled "Fed up"

But we've all had $#%^ lives Starchecker. You're not the only one whose been hurt. We've all been hurt...but we all deal with it differently...I don't really care if you have or haven't got a problem with cluster B's or not...What's more important is that your input in this thread is rather inappropriate...given the title...

If you're getting a bad responce in this thread...you have rather provoked it...wouldn't you think...

to madame blue eyes:

We have more empathy than we need.
We are truely emotional people.

isn't that the truth!



i believe that bpd is definately more of an emotional disorder than a personality disorder (though i suppose the two are inextricably intertwined). it is interesting to note that they are considering changing the name to emotional disregulation disorder. and i have even read about theories that it may not even be a personality disorder, but a mood disorder, or even a more complex from of ptsd. i don't know if i agree with these things 100% right now, as i don't know a whole lot about it, but it is very intereresting to note. and something i hope to be able to find the time to research.

just for clarity, when you say "hx" are you referring to the history of the person with bpd? if you are i completely agree with you. the history of the person with bpd is absolutely crucial to understanding their individual symptoms and behaviors.

and i agree with what you say about throwing "cluster b" out the window: generalizing people as "cluster a/b/c", or whatever, really serves no purpose. those clusters/groups exist for the study and understanding of personality disorders in general, and isn't really all that helpful when you are dealing with an individual. aspd and npd are very different from bpd and have nothing to do with us.

and it's not that i'm saying generalizing is bad in all instances (i do believe that people with mental/emotional illnesses should do as much research and learning about their disorders and everything related), but it's just that when you are dealing with someone in the process of recovery (which we are all still in; recovery is a life-time committment when you have a mental/emotional disorder/sickness), it is specifics that are custom fit to their own histories and symptoms that are going to help them the most.

to caladonian:

Well...couldn't help noticing the thread title from you Sobriainebrietas...and as a graphic demostration of Karma, in that what you put out there comes back round, I'll give you a bit of hand, maam.

thank you for that. i also believe that what goes around comes around. and i am glad to see that you are still interested in participating in this forum. your help and your kind words are much appreciated.



also: i just want you to know that it really wasn't your posts that bothered me, because i could see that you cared about your ex and understood your girlfriends disorder enough to not hate her for it. and because i can see that you have done a lot of research, and have quite a bit of understanding as to what we borderlines have to go through. you yourself are a very empathetic person i think.

thank you for your replies.



to starchecker:

I was not attacking her in any way, and it appears she was able to understand that. Thank you Erin.

well thank you for that. i understand that everyone has been through their own experiences and is entitled to voice their opinions. i do try my best to be understanding, and i really am not the kind of person who likes creating conflict. i have always been more of a peacekeeper, though i can't say i am very good at keeping the peace with my own inner conflict.

but anyhow. yeah i have also just recently started learning about my mbpt - infp. it does clear up a lot of things and has been really helpful, though i am noticing that it certainly compicates things with my bpd! i recommend everyone to find out what theirs is and learn more about it. it is very helpful.

it is interesting that you say that cluster b personalities are all variations of npd, becuase there are many people who have said the same things regarding bpd! i don't know if i believe either argument, but it is interesting.

to everyone: thank you for your replies. i hope i haven't been the one to provoke. though i can't say i am sorry for stirring things up a little in here! i was starting to feel rather lonely in this forum. there hasn't been anyone who actually has bpd in here for weeks!

erin

yeh, I hear that. They come in waves don't they?

Thank you for the topic, because I personally, totally agree with your feelings.

It was a discussion, that is all. You shouldn't feel bad.

Take care, see ya round the forum