lost inside dont kno wat to do with myself

I applied for uni in the summer while I was feeling pretty confident and pretty good. I started two weeks ago, I went for two days and Ive officialy left the course today. I cant get my head together about it and my emotions are so so overwhelming, I just know I couldnt do it. I was out of education for years and I hate social things or many ppl. I spent so much time thinkin wat they wrre thinkin of me and wat horrible things were being sed about me that I couldnt focus on the subject and I didnt really care that much because I just spent so much energy trying to think of how to be and how I didnt fit in or belong. I felt like could do it all and it instantly flipped and I just didnt want to do the course for reasons I just dont kno. I tried so hard to pretend to myself and others that I was fine and its all going good. I realisef it really wasnt wen I dreaded thinkin about it. I cant do it, its everything and its hard and panicky tryin to find how an earth I will explain to others.
Ive been in panics, feelung everything that I cant explain how down I feel, I kno ive let ppl down and im useless, a dissapointment. Ive spent most of mine time in my room, but tryin to focus on much is so difficult and iv got so frustrated that iv broken things and get irritable at ppl about stuff like wat to watch or to eat, It just gets me annoyed. Ive been feelin of like my body wants to twitch, like u can rest but there are lots of fleas under u and r jumping. Ive not bin on my sertraline for about 5days now and b4 that I took the odd dose. I was only on 50mgs so I didnt think it wud make a difference I don' know if it hhas or not but I
dont kno if anyone else knows about meds etc?
I literally dont kno wat to with myself, I dont kno how to try and explain how terrible I feel inside and how its all so overwhelming and how I can feel wat ppl wud say r not gud copibg mechanisms coming bk in. I feel mysrlf just staring for ages and feeling everything but showing nothing. Then feeling everything and showing it. Im quite a quiet person and its the stuff inside noone can see and its torture

I'm sorry to hear that you're going through such a difficult time. Try to take care of yourself and self soothe, self validation is also important in situations like these. I know they are not easy to do as everything in your mind and body is telling you otherwise, but they do help.

I'm sure this is a very upsetting time for you. If people are saying bad things about you, #%^& them. You can't let people get the better of you. I am paranoid schizophrenic. so i know all about how you feel as far as people talking about you. I've felt that way before. I got over my paranoia by realizing something. If they are talking about you, obviously you are really awesome or something. Because they feel the need to try to put you down and talk about you. Obviously they have nothing better to talk about. Basically i sort of took a narcissistic take on why they were talking about me. I started to not care anymore what people say about me. But you can't let people get you down. If you do they win. And i prefer not to let bad people get the better of me. I have a very supportive family, and very supportive church family, and friends outside of all that to help me. Just don't let the bad people get you down. You gotta take what some people say with a grain of salt.