Sleeping my life away

This CANNOT be normal. It just can't be. It doesn't make any ######6 sense.

Every afternoon after a good sleep (which takes 12 hours... that in itself is not normal), I wake up okay, or sometimes even in a good mood. I go for most of my day at least feeling okay. On that scale of 0-10, I'd give it about a 5.5 or 6 most afternoons -- more 6 than 5.5 though. I was told by a psychiatrist once that 6 is generally where most people sit. So I feel cool with that. However, as the evening comes -- sometimes as early as eight hours after I've woken up -- I get depressed. Some nights it doesn't sink down too far, relatively; other nights it spirals all the way down to wishing I was dead. But I always end my day feeling depressed and #######5 and this and that and the other thing. And I am ######6 SICK of it.

I'm sick of the fact that I have to spend literally half of every 24 hour day sleeping just to feel rested. I'm sick of feeling like $#%^ EVERY ######6 NIGHT for NO GOOD REASON. Being vaguely tired, or missing one or two hours of sleep, shouldn't make someone suicidal. I mean, for ###$'s sake. That's just not normal, people!

I want someone to figure out my ######6 problem, and I want them to figure it out NOW. Now now now. I'm pretty convinced it has nothing to do with faulty chemicals in my brain (although you never know) and has a lot more to do with something physical. I don't know what that something is... I just know that I have to find out what the ###$ is wrong before I go CRAZY.

Hon, I assume you are bpd from your posting here.

With bpd too much sleep is worse than not enough, and can cause us to feel depressed.

You are a rage stage, I have to take haldol for this, one then 15 min later another one. Then a hot bath for irritability.

Bpd is associated with depression, but unfortunatley psychdocs don't recognize it as a medication treatable disorder as it is a personality disorder. They give it to a psychologist to treat with therapy.

Alot of folks print this and take it to their doctor. You might consider that.

Here is another website to help, and there are many resources for you at the top of this forum. The bpd forum.

ttys,

http://www.borderlinepersonalitytoday.com/main/anon.htm

Bpd is hard, I've had it since my early 20's , recovered for 5 years and relapsed a few weeks ago. Still don't know why.

Try to think in grey, instead of every thing is ###$, or every thing is great.

Scaling is also good.

I hope this helps alittle. I tend to give advice on what I have lived thru , since I am ancient(black thought.).