Can't stop obsessing over my nose and teeth.

Hello everyone,

I'm a 29-year old male, and I'm not even sure I have BDD. But what I am stricken with certainly feels a whole lot like it. Ever since I was old enough to be self-aware I've despised my nose. It's big, crooked, and I would even go as far to say that it's malformed. The funniest part about it is, in the mirror it's barely noticeable, but get me on video or almost any photographic angle and it sticks out like a sore thumb. Funny enough, despite how disfigured I find it to be, I do receive compliments on my looks from time-to-time. I've also been called Owen Wilson, Wade Barrett, Doug Funny, and an array of other insulting names at least once or twice, which only confirms the fear that my nose is big and crooked. Aside from this I am also refered to as "handsome" or have had women tell me I should be a male model along with some other, more pleasing comparisons. This mixed bag of opinions has led me to not even know what I am or look like anymore. Am I a goofy-looking weirdo or a handsome man? Both? Maybe it's all in the eye of the beholder. Others opinions aside, the fact of the matter is that what I behold when I see myself in videos or candid photographs is that I am absolutely hideous. The vanity I feel just thinking about it is enough to make me sick. I don't wish to obsess over looks and these things but considering I've been contending with this hatred for my entire adult life I know that I'm never going to be happy, have a relationship, or advance in my life with this self-loathing obsession rearing it's ugly head in the backdrop of my mind. It, along with depression and anxiety most likely stemming from it, has affected every aspect of my life. I haven't had a healthy relationship(or barely any relationships at all for that matter) in about 7 years. I stay at home after work and either sleep, or slip into a fantasy world of video games and films. The way I coped with it for the most part was avoiding candid photos and never appearing in videos so I don't have to face the music about what I truly look like to others. The very sight of my true self is enough to shatter the minut traces of confidence I may be holding onto. No matter what compliments I receive about my looks(and they do happen. For example, had a girl on the elevator go on about how "hot" I was, and previous ex-girlfriends saying the same). At the end of the day though, their words fall upon deaf ears, because I find myself to be absolutely atrocious to look at. My crooked, prominent, and large nose is the prime contributor to this sensation. Recently, I started to take videos of myself to try and face the fears, or prove to myself that I'm not as disfigured as I see myself to be, but it's only made the issue hit rock bottom. Now I see crooked teeth, an inflated frog-like neck, and sagging eyes. I'm starting to think about ending it all due to this because I see no other way out or escape from the feelings of inadequacy. I've been seeing a therapist for anxiety and depression, but deep down I see the only recourse coming from plastic surgery. I'm completely against that route due to it being fake, vain, and unnatural. Also... who knows if it'll get botched? I just wish there was something I could do to feel normal and adequate in society, to sustain a healthy relationship without the feelings of disgust for my appearance getting in the way. I wish I could be free of the convoluted views I've built up in my mind. The mirror has lied to me for years, to the point were I saw myself as far above average. But now having seen the real me, I know I can never go back to that method of thought. I know that my nose looks crooked and malformed, and now my teeth do as well. See, I had dreams of being a film actor but have never been able to pursue them due to my less than photogenic features. I can't pursue any goals in my life with these obsessions continuing to break me down. Looking back on this post it almost sounds hilarious, even to me... But I am sick of dealing with things I can't control and just want help to break out of it so I can maybe get my life back on track and stop feeling like an un-worthy sub-human being. Any responses would be greatly appreciated.