pure self hatred..

For many years i have had trouble accepting my appearance, to the point where it makes me wanna take my own life. I don't want to sound selfiere i am just writing how i feel daily. I can no longer leave the house or socialize or even go out for a drink. The furthest i can go is the shops and even then i cover my face and look down at the ground when i walk. I am to ashamed to look anyone in the eye, too ashamed to be seem in public. Im ashamed when i see my own reflection so why wouldn't anyone else. I don't have a life, job, girlfriend, friends. Anything because i cannot bare to let people see me. What's a person to do when they are so ashamed of themselves . People who Havent been through it or suffer like this wouldn't understand . Also having social anxiety , depression and general anxiety makes it harder . No girl wants someone like that to bring them down , not even friends would . I don't tell the friends i once had what i go through i am ashamed hopefully people on here who have similar problems May understand the difficulty one faces when battling your own selfbattle with yourself

Hi SomeGuy2014. What used to help me when I hated my self for my appearance is, I would not look at any mirrors. If I avoided looking at my self long enough, I would feel better because I would not be thinking about my looks. If you have to look in the mirror only do a glance like say if you want to make sure there is not something on your face, that's what I did. It seriously helps. I suggest seeing a therapist as well, you really are in a position where you need one. There is also medication for bad anxiety, you should see a doctor about that. I hope things get better for you. Welcome to the forums, I hope you stay as long as you need support or longer.

someguy2014 wrote:For many years i have had trouble accepting my appearance, to the point where it makes me wanna take my own life. I don't want to sound selfiere i am just writing how i feel daily. I can no longer leave the house or socialize or even go out for a drink. The furthest i can go is the shops and even then i cover my face and look down at the ground when i walk. I am to ashamed to look anyone in the eye, too ashamed to be seem in public. Im ashamed when i see my own reflection so why wouldn't anyone else. I don't have a life, job, girlfriend, friends. Anything because i cannot bare to let people see me. What's a person to do when they are so ashamed of themselves . People who Havent been through it or suffer like this wouldn't understand . Also having social anxiety , depression and general anxiety makes it harder . No girl wants someone like that to bring them down , not even friends would . I don't tell the friends i once had what i go through i am ashamed hopefully people on here who have similar problems May understand the difficulty one faces when battling your own selfbattle with yourself

That sounds like Body Dysmorphic Disorder. I had that for many years and I hated being in public too. The way I cured the disorder was by staring other men's faces and seeing how my own faced compared to theirs and I soon realized that there were a lot uglier guys than me and it made me feel better about my appearance. What makes you so certain that you are not attractive?

I'm going to mirror this thread into BDD. Good luck.

I've been pretty down lately as well. I'm going to a new high school tomorrow and I can't stand all the anxiety building up already. When I'm in the car with my mom, I sit in the back and keep my head down. It's gotten pretty bad I guess.

You have to recognize that what you see in the mirror is not what everyone else sees when they look at you. Anyway, please hang in there and contact me if you need to talk!

Are you currently receiving any therapy at the moment Someguy? For most of us these core beliefs like "I am not worthy" or "I am a monster, nobody will want me" are so deep rooted in our psyche that it takes a lot of work to uproot and dislodge them.