Need advise concerning family member please

Hi,

I've a family member who I suspect has bipolar. They are highly volatile emotionally and always have been. One thing could make them kick off badly and they are not open to listening to other people's opinion etc because their own is always right. One day they were describing how they feel so high one minute and come crashing down the next... so I gently approached the subject of bipolar. They listened to me and said they had even mentioned it to their counselor (who disagreed) and maybe it would be best to ask the dr as this family member showed many signs of bipolar. They made an appointment but the few days before the appointment some annoying friends stated that this family member didn't have bipolar and that our family weren't 'accepting' their personality and who they are as a person.

This made the family member believe I was bullying them and it proceeded in me getting a mouthful down the phone. I didn't say what I did lightly, they've openly said they've felt like committing suicide before, they can't hold down a job for very long, they've never had one long term relationship, is constantly in debt for a very long time and there is so much more to this story. I really wouldn't of stated it unless I really believe they show true symptoms of bipolar.

I feel hopeless to help them. Once again they are having to leave a job and I can't even make out the reasons why anymore, they have a child who is having lots of problems but they never see it from their child's point of view, all I hear is 'My child never thinks of me or what they are putting me through!!'

How can I help this person if they won't help themselves?

Unfortunately there isn't much that you can do. The person needs to want to seek help themselves. I would suggest just continuing to try to be a supportive family member.

Welcome SJE1606.

It’s obvious you care about your family member a lot and this is hard for you. *hugs* It’s a tough situation. Whatever the case, bipolar or not, I hope that over time they will see you are on their side and take what you say in the spirit intended. Sometimes a person has to hit bottom before they start making the changes they need to to improve their own life. Like Cheze said, a person has to want to help themself.

Take care,
Jan