Does my husband have bipolar or am in just in denial?

Pls help me determine if my husband is bipolar. After two years of marriage, he recently told me he was unhappy, never loved me, and wanted a divorce. Apparently, he did a similar thing to his previous wife (of 3 years). My husband is a charasmatic, fun guy to be around, people gravitate towards him. He can be sweet and go out of his way to do creative things for me. But he sometimes seems like he is not altogether present. He zones out in front of the tv and watches every sporting event that comes on. He drinks an average of 3 drinks a night (more on weekends), and at least once a month binge drinks with a bunch of his buddies from our old city. These buddies are not professionals like he is, and the only thing they seem to have in common is drinking. When they drink together, they will often do so from afternoon until midday the next day (he is 38 yrs old). My husband does manage to keep it together during work, and is very successful. Although my husband is often worried about the impression he makes on others, he will make completely inappropriate (and plain unfunny) "jokes", especially when he drinks. Sometimes even a few drinks turns him into a different person that I do not recognize at all, he almost seems like a "big stupid child" for lack of a better description. He also gets very easily angry and frustrated at things most people would let pass. For example, he recently broke an expensive golf club and a gps system because they weren't functioning properly. He has problems staying asleep, and sometimes gets night terrors. He is very impulsive and formerly had debt problems. He gets upset with me when I try to reign in his impulsive spending. I've had a sense there is something "off" with him, but he can have such a sweet and loving nature I've tried to ignore it. I recently saw a therapist and although he did not meet my husband, told me it sounded like bipolar. I was shocked to hear this because I only thought of bipolar as the classic mania up all night all the time type thing. Does anyone know if this is bipolar, and if this explains his sudden need for a divorce? Or am I just in denial about him ever loving me?

It could be bipolar, it also has a deal to due with his drinking too. My mom and sister are bipolar, I have had it explained to me by both of them as High highs and low lows. I have been told that there really is no middle ground for them in their moods. My mom also gets very mean when she drinks. I cant say for sure what it is, as Im not a doctor and also not bipolar. If he is willing to see a doctor that could help. He may be depressed and feels like something in his life needs to change to make him happy. He also might be one of those people that doesn't realize they don't want to be married till its too late

There are so many different type of depressive disorder-do a google search-Symptoms of Depression or Symptoms of Bi polor.

Yes it could be bi polar.
but it could be Post Traumatic Stress Disorder?

kiki,

along with what the others say, it could be ADHD, trauma/PTSD, or a host of other things.

My wife of 18 years has seen me in similar states, she has seen progress (lots sometimes), she has seen backtracking, she has seen me become a really attentive parent and spouse. She's a tremendous person and no doormat.

I have no idea how things may go for you and your husband. I do hope that it will be the best possible outcome for you both.

Take care,
W

Borderline personality disorder has frequent mood swings in common with bipolar, though it is usually found more in women. Depression and alcoholism are categories withing themselves, but could be co-occuring disorders that complicate diagnosis.

You know in a way that sounds like my step dad. He use to drink all the time. He would get mad at the smallest things. He also use to hit my mom. There where times where we had to go to a motel because the police said since he lives there they cant do anything. There was a time where my mom got arrested because he cut himself and said my mom did it. But then they got back together. But before they did she made him agree to get help. It turned out he was bipolar and drinking made it worse so he went to a mental institution. Now he is better and he he doesnt drink but sometimes he gets in depressing moods and stuff bnutyou know. Try to talk your husband into seeing a phycologist then after you get him to agree talk him into quit drinking. Get him professonal help. If he asks why tell him its because you love him. If he says no then I dont know what to do. I mean it may take a while it took my mom 4 months to get my step dad to finally agree. But remember one thing about drinking. You will never be cured from alcohalism because its a disease which means if you drink after a few months of drinking you will become adicted to alcohal once again so never let him see or drink it again.

remember one drink can push an alcohalic over bored