My Day (not so great)

Stream of consciousness writing go!

So I had this meeting at school for Honors Psychology and we talked about Grad school and it was was probably one of the most exciting/horrible things because you need like a 3.7 GPA to apply for graduate school and the cohort average is like 3.9 or higher (how the F! do you do that). So I was all excited and I started planning my thesis (I'm in 3rd year which is kinda weird that I'm planning this early without even contacting an adviser but I figure I'm some kind of Will-Hunting-esque-undiscovered genius[this may just be a grandiose delusion because my neurons are firing at an abnormally high rate releasing loads of the mania neurotransmitter]) Then I got home starting working on school stuff then got so manic I ran for like an hour and half around town at midnight to some rocking tunes (The aforementioned rockin tunes http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eimgRedLkkU). But I really have this fear that I'm not going to get in Graduate school and then commit suicide as a result of the shame which really makes school really stressful because if I don't get withing the top 5% of the grading curve then through a Rube-Goldberg-like series of events end up jumping off of something really high and or perform some other form of high efficacy suicidal behaviour.

Anyways... I wish I had something nice to say but I don't (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJ_R-G_i4Xk)

Hi Infinite_Jester. What I would say to you is whilst studies and career are important they are not everything and you need to make sure you have a strong core in order to deal with whatever is thrown your way, esp if you are thinking of study and work in a high functioning area which evidently you are as many challenges will be chucked at you. I am a Dr although that is not the role I am in on this board, and I am currently not working. I thought that I would kill myself when I was forced off sick but now despite it not being the path I wanted it has allowed me time to build myself up. What I am getting at is hopefully you will get what you want with your studies but if you dont please view it as some sort of opportunity even if it does not feel like that and keep safe. It is not worth killing yourself over.

Thinking of you

Cracked

Thanks for the support. I appreciate it.

No problem and if I can help at all please let me know.

Cracked