What's Your Story?

Hey everybody,

My name is Mavi, 28 years old.
I am diagnosed 6 years ago after a major manic episode that slipped into a psychose wich lead into staying in the hospital for about 3 months.

After that my life just turned upside down and I'm doing my best of coping with everything.

The depressive episodes are there since I did hit puberty but to cope with the manic (hypomania) episodes in between are hard for me.

The few moments that I am 'stable', I don't feel stable at all and I am trying to fix that now by doing Mentalization-Based Treatment. It's a long treatment that I have been doing for almost 1 year now and I it will finish after about 2 years.

I really hope this will help me to love myself and cope better in life and deal with the bipolar disorder better.

I am currently on lithium, been on several other mood stabilisators but this one works the best for me. The episodes did never go away, they are just a bit less intens.

I am also diganosed with ADD and have some traces of BPD.

Thanks for reading and I am happy that I did find this forum.

Hello, I am Rye,
I grew up in a very loving upper middle class environment with my brother and two younger (twin) sisters. Best Mother and Father in the world. All my family lived on the same street growing up. Aunts, uncles, cousins, both sets of Grandparents. A picture perfect childhood.

In 1989 I went to a mall with some friends and somehow got separated from them. Shear panic gripped me. I started hearing all the thoughts of the people who walked by me, the voices got so loud I covered my ears. I got myself into a ball on floor, some security guards helped to get me outside on my request, and called a cab for me. Terrifying! I have (to this day) have not been back to a mall.

I started my career early teaching children with developmental disabilities, then later working with adults with mental retardation and various mental health issues in mini institutions and group homes. I married the man of my dreams at the age of 25 (still married to him), and had a little baby girl at the age of 26. The apple of our eyes.

Shortly after having my beautiful baby girl, my husband noticed that I was having short bouts of rage (unexplained) over little things. These short little bouts began to become longer, followed by longer bouts of depression and excessive sleeping.

During my second pregnancy, for no reason at all, I was completely furious at him the entire pregnancy, while at the same time sanded and repainted/wall papered the entire inside of my house, while working. After having my second baby daughter I went into total exhaustion and depression for several months. I wanted this second child so I was completely unable to explain this mood.

For years these mood cycles would continue while I continued with my career, opened my own business (serving adults with mental disabilities and illnesses). All the while having these mood swings. All the while, my husband begging me to see a psychiatrist, which infuriated me more, because it wasn't me it was him. It had to be him because I worked with people who had various mental illnesses and I would know if I had one.

With Medicaid changes, I ended up having to close my business, which was really fine with me because I was tired of the 24/7 and was ready for a 9-5 after 18 years. I taught myself MicroSoft Excel/Access/PowerPoint and all that good stuff and became and Analyst for a huge Corporation. It was a long commute and a stressful job. But I had an office and didn't have to communicate very much with anyone. Perfect.

Whoa, then they wanted me to start going to meeting. Sitting in a conference room, I thought I was reading everyone's mind all at one time. Panic attack. Forgot all my work and what it meant. Turned in my resignation that day. Wanted to crash my car into a tree on the way home. Next day, couldn't remember how to do my job, screwed up everything I was working on. Commuted home with the same thoughts of crashing my car. Went home and started drinking.

Then it all went to hell in a hand basket...here I am 4 years later and still don't have a grip on it yet.

Sorry it's a long story, but my story didn't start when I was a kid, it started as an adult. A bit hard to swallow. I could understand it if there was a major bad life event that triggered it. In some ways, I drive myself crazy trying to find the answer as to why. No one is immune.

Hi Guys

Sorry for the delay in replying to some of the posts here Thank you for introducing yourselves and a very warm welcome. I hope that you like it here

Hugs

Cracked

Hey guys
I made an earlier topic introducing myself, but regardless I'll say "Hey" again

Hello! I'm Kikk
21, M

After months of conflict with myself I finally went to see a psychiatrist and got myself properly diagnosed.
So far I have:
Bipolar II with Melancholic Episodes and Social Anxiety Disorder.

I also possibly have PTSD and show some signs of some personality disorder, my psyc needs more time with me to analysis me for any further diagnosis.

I am so happy with the diagnosis as I can finally now get the help I need to live a Happy and Healthy life. I feel as if a massive burden of self doubt has been lifted off my shoulders.
Good start to the New year

Hi Kikk! Nice attitude. I remember reading my diagnosis in the hospital, and breaking down in tears. I was 18. But the tears soon dried up and, like you, I felt a burden lift - and I saw that I could now work on the future. Welcome, and I hope you can share your story with us, as you go along.

cheers,

Otter.