Am i a bipolar... Please tell me...

Hello everyone,

I will make it short for everyone. Now, where i came from kids who were born out of marriage unfortunately are looked down on, and i was one of them, My mother had me with her BF and got married to someone else, so my step father adopted me. Basically, i never knew about my story. However, i used to meet my biological dad from time to time since he lives in another country. So despite of my young age i observed the similarities and i felt that he was my father, but i kept quit, not even a word since i was 9. Until finaly my dad shows up, telling me he is my dad. Well i did not react, cos i kind of knew about it. Within that period of time keeping the secret inside and asking myself so many questions and feeling rejected and unwanted, i had some type of mood swings, sometimes i laugh for no reason till my teacher kickes me out of the class, and sometimes i cry, other times, i loose concentration and stare from the window for couple of minutes and then i get back. I was also unhappy with my financial situation, as a teenager i want it to dress up nicely and go out with friends and to the swimming pools, but i could not afford. so i stayed locked up in the house sitting in my balcony in the 4 floor. while looking down on the street, i wonder how is it like to fall from that balcony, so i see myself falling down in a slow motion. I had sometimes feeling to commit suicide when i was a teenager but i could not do it, instead i prayed. I also saw my mother suffering finacial crisis, she was cheated on by my step father. Moreover, she used to always tell me to be stronger than her and to seek a higher education. I was a good student, despite of my situation i was the second in the whole school. hmmm, let me shorten it up a bit. So i turned 18 and i got married to someone i know for a very short time, i lived with my husband faraway from my mother. Now, After 3 years of marriage and after the birth of my daughter my husband starts to drink and abuses me verbaly, sometimes physically. He even brings up my dads topic, and insult me. He used one credit card that was on my name and ruined my credit score. The verbal abuse had continued till one day he hit me on the nose that caused bleeding, so i got him arrested but then i released him. My husband did a nice things to me but bad things are overtaking the scale. I don`t know if i see him as a negative person because of what has happened in my life. But i feel like he is not as ambition as i am. I look at other people who are my ages and i feel like they are advancing and i am sitting in the same spot. I feel like i have bipolar, Now that i am 28 i don`t feel like suiciding, but i get irritated. all those negative thoughts gather in my head and i feel like shocking.
What do you think?
help me.

Hi iampretty,

Welcome to the forums.

I can't tell for sure if you have bipolar disorder or not, but honestly it sounds like the least of your worries right now. I'm extremely concerned that you're living with an abusive, irresponsible husband. Was HE the one who told you that you're bipolar?

I think that your feelings are normal. You've had a lot of stress in your life, and I see that the reactions you had are pretty much consistent with the stress.

I think that you should still see a counselor, though. There are ways to repair an unhealthy relationship, but many abusers DON'T CHANGE. I'm worried for your safety; for your credit. And most of all, I'm worried that you MIGHT get some kind of emotional damage if you stay with this guy.

I'm not sure what things are like where you were born. But where I sit, people have certain rights. And one of those rights is the right to leave an abusive husband.

Please let me know how you're doing.

--Frayed

Frayed,

Thank u so much for your response. I think that after my husband got arrested, he changed a lot. And he was the one who requested to go to a conselor, so i want to give him a last chance. Believe me it is his LAST chance!! He also promised to pay the credit card he used. so i m going to see. So you don`t think i am a bipolar, Right? I think i just need to improve what upsets me and i will be fine.

Thank you so much and i will keep u posted:)

Hi iampretty,

Yep, I think you're fine. But if you're worried, you can see a therapist to make sure. You would probably benefit from one anyway, since you've got a lot of re-building to do in your relationship, and seeing one might help you help your husband.

You're a brave woman for giving him this chance. I respect that you're giving him the opportunity to change. But DEFINITELY keep me posted.

Stay safe!

--Frayed

I would have to agree. Sounds like there are bigger problems that possibly bipolar. I am no expert, but I think that once your personal life returns to normal, you will be fine. You do also seem to get something called secondary bipolar, where the bipolar is caused by something else. The part about staring out of the window could indicate some form of Epilepsy, which can also have similar symptoms to Bipolar.

But see a good counsellor - they will know best, and refer you to a neurologist/psychiatrist if they think it is necessary.