Manic depression is simple

Yes. I'm finding it easier and easier to cut my dad out, except that I'm so angry that I don't want to ever bring him back into my life, and everyone keeps saying "oh, well someday you'll feel differently", but right now I can't imaging anything other than hating him.

Life is very long, and things can change so much over time. I know why you are ruling out liking him again, but I'm saying that you can't be 100% sure on that. There were times when I thought that I could never love my parents, but here I am right now getting on well with them. They didn't change - I did. I changed the way that I interact with them.

Kevin

My father was/is abusive though. And that makes things much more difficult. It's been a rough day. I was just talking about this stuff in therapy and I got pretty emotional. So I'm not feeling so great right now.

This might be sort of a random comment here, but I know how you feel, element. I'm sorry you've had a bad day. It's getting easier for me to cut my dad out of my life too. My dad's the same way. He doesn't help with this at all; he just makes it five times worse. I still haven't talked about my issues about my dad with my therapist. I'm trying to avoid it, because I know I'll start crying or getting angry, and I don't want to do either.

Anyway, I hope you feel better (:

Thanks aly,
I would suggest that you do talk to your therapist about your dad though, because otherwise the feeling just build up and your like a bomb waiting to explode. And part of therapy is crying and becoming angry. I did today actually, both of them.

element

xx aly, crying can be a positive thing, you know? If you feel like crying, then don't stop yourself from doing so. However, if you cannot open-up to talk about your father to your therapist, then you could perhaps write about him and then hand that to the therapist. You could also - of course - talk to anyone here about him too. Just don't keep it locked-up inside, okay?

TAke care,
Kevin

I guess you're both right. I'm gonna try talking to the therapist Saturday about him. I'm sort of nervous, but like you said, I shouldn't keep it locked up inside.

That's great - If you plan what you want to say about him before going to the therapist, then it will be easier. I'm really happy that you have decided to do this though. 'Congratulations' (<- okay, I know that 'congrats' in this sense are a bit strange, but you know what I mean!).

Kevin

Yeah, I'm still trying to figure out what all I want to say.

Haha, thanks, I guess. (:

My dear friend, writing it on paper will help.