Thoughts on stigma

I just got off the phone w my Mom because I wanted to know if I have any family history of brain imbalances/mental illness. She said "No and don't you dare put ME in that category."
I was then thinking of how when someone is diagnosed with cancer or diabetes etc that people are more apt to show empathy and compassion compared to a mental illness. It might be because of the way it manifests with behavior and emotions- unpredictable does not make people comfortable usually.

I sense it runs deeper than this though. Bipolar used to be called Manic-Depressive Psychosis and people were referred to as "maniacs." Also I think it was Charlotte Perkins Gillman who wrote "The Yellow Wallpaper" who was locked in a room as treatment for "hysteria."

I've been called "weak" and told to "get a life" by people who say they love me when depressed. It is not helpful. I am starting to realize the importance of surrounding myself with people who try to understand instead of condemn. I'd rather be alone.

Maybe in the future I can somehow affect the stigma of mental illness in some way. To utilize my experiences for good would really be wonderful. I'd like to make things a little easier for people.

Luckily(?), I don't have friends and I am not very close to my family so they don't really care. As for my wife, she has to live with me so it was in her best interest to educate herself. I think a lot of people would rather just absolve themselves from the situation than modify their cognitive bias with education. People have enough to deal with in their lives so, path of least resistance.

Unfortunately I have made the mistake of sharing my status with people that I shouldn't and they look at me like I'm an insect and act like they want to grab their children and run. But I do behave really weird sometimes. Actually a lot. People act all understanding and compassionate, but let someone suggest that they might need to be on meds and suddenly it comes out just how inferior they view me. And I really love it when people ask "Are you on your meds?" Yes there is still a stigma, I don't care what people say.

I care about what people say, yet at the same time, I'd rather be alone than to allow it to color my view of life anymore. Go ###$ yourselves!!! I really mean that. And I sort of wish I could let them know immediately that's how I feel. Maybe I will when I realize what they are really thinking. I mean what difference does it make, they still don't want me in their life, so at least I can stand up for myself. Yeah, stigma to me spells ignorant people. Uneducated imbeciles.

Yeah stigma is real and it's definitely all over the place. I've gotten a number of responses after disclosing. Most people don't know much about it and will respond in a seemingly compassionate way, but I feel these people are just acting that way because they feel a duty to do so. Some people ghost me immediately. My ex used it against me, constantly telling me I'm unstable when I wasn't and he was beating me. Talk about gaslighting. I find the truly understanding people are those that have a disorder or condition themselves.

I agree with Quietgirl. People that judge me harshly can !@#$%^& off.

I don't say anything to the clearly narrow-minded people. Why do so?

When talking to people with some knowledge, I say I have made extremely bad things in the past and that's it - since I don't have violent outbreaks anymore and I believe I have changed a lot as a person: I believe people can change, that this disturbance is not chronic, and that I'm a living example of this.

I talk about my situation with those educated people saying "I'm a guy with emotional disturbances", not like "I have bipolar disorder". "Bipolar disorder" is a nasty label in my opinion. They see you as a dangerous person.

Of course I'm still a disturbed person. I still have my highs and lows. So I mention the problem sometimes; I talk about my weaning off medications, my meditation practice, my personality change over the years etc. Some time ago I took insane amounts of medications and still had outbreaks. Now, with more emotional maturity and meditation practice, I can live a better life without outbreaks with way less medications and my goal is to be medication-free.

Even after/if I get to be completely medication free, I will still educate people about the nastiness of such a label and how it damages people's self-esteem with the stigma. It's not easy to live with that label and with the prejudice of the society. I think that it should be abolished and we should be treated as just humans who go through problems, not walking labels. It simply reinforces stigma.

Just my two cents - my humble opinion. Not trying to damage the forum's intent in any aspect.

Lately i think ive been trying to get over the stigma i have towards the illnes and myself in general. its caused alot of self loathing that im aware of and have been soo desperately trying to stop.

i feel lazy, i feel ireesponsible. i feel weak. i feel.like even if they dont tell me my step.dad and people at work think im a "waste of potential" i used to be able to hold my head up high no matter how hard i fell.....lately i cant hold my head up at all really. and im not even drinking. im just tired of being me. im trying to remind my self that im in healing ....but i just keep.feeling like im lying to myself like im fake...

LFlow456, I have ADD and that really does a number on me with organization and trying to organize myself. I have what seems like millions of little notes everywhere. Even on my sink mirror. Bipolar is stable for now, but I see myself as scatter-brained, lazy, and I hope this new job I got, I will do well. I have hope I'll do fine, but still, I want to be at my utmost best and take my ritalin. I didn't mean to get to only talking about ADD, but I get those same feelings you get with the stigma of bipolar as well.

quietgirl2538 As far as the stigma with ADD , i understand 100% theres soo much stigma with ADD too. i used to feel i had it growing up because i just couldnt stay in class pr be still. and i still have trouble concentrating or just enjoying the dang moment. for me, sometimes im militant organizied and others im a total mess.

I really hope everything goes well for you at work . i know how deeply we all strive for perfection even when people think we dont give a damn . its such a task to just keep in line and it hurts us that we cant do it sometimes. you seem like youve got it this time around, just how im feeling .....did you say that youre NOT at your best when on ritalin? or you are?

I sincerely apologize for such a late reply.

did you say that youre NOT at your best when on ritalin? or you are?

Indeed I am at my best and can concentrate when I'm on ritalin.

I'm still waiting on the answer if I got the job or not. I'll post here with an update.

I am such a mess at times with having to remember things because my thoughts wander so quickly. I am diagnosed as having ADD. That helps just to know it. It was my choice to be on meds or not since I'm already 44 and I've been without them for so long. It does a lot of good for my mood too. I take it twice a day. Can you describe how you are on a daily basis and in how you believe you may have ADD. We can compare notes as to our symptoms.

I will try my utmost best at this possible job. I will give it my best shot and go from there. I have a trial basis of 30 days. I can decide it's not for me, as well. I try and some days I have it together and other days I just push on. I feel very positive at this point in my life. I trust the meds cocktail I have, my pdoc, and my support system which includes my therapist.