Relationships during therapy

A couple of days ago we went for a walk with my SO, he put his glasses on and a new jacket, he hasn't been wearing those glasses in 5 years or something so it oddly triggered my fluctuating trust towards him - it's been previously proved that my SO is sometimes doing things to provoke, like he is testing me and like it would prove something. It's actually quite odd.
And now he was looking just like this guy who's kinda been following me, I know, there's no obvious connection, but it bothered me so I said he looked just like him. My SO was then looking to ask for more, but it had a premise for a fight and I didn't want to fight, so I dodged it and became quiet.

So yesterday, I'm about to go to bathroom but there's a chaos and water on a floor. So I yell, why haven't you done what you're supposed to, what you promised the last time! Yes I yelled, I was annoyed it wasn't the first time this happened.
My SO is sitting there with headphones on, the kind that blocks external noise.
He comes to me and asks with a blank face if there's something else that is so upsetting for me, to which I reply there isn't, at this point I really was just slightly annoyed. He is still being deadpan, I can't read him, but it seems like he doesn't believe me.
We get into an argument where he claims I was just shouting at him out of the blue, claiming I'm ruining everyone's atmosphere. Even though this is something I've requested many times before and as a rule who last leaves the bathroom after sauna, shall be cleaning the floor.
But he is claiming these incidents are not even related, supposedly I was just shouting without an obvious reason and I was shouting at him.

But recently when he was shouting to our son for similar reasons, after mentioning what ever the problem was at the time for a few times in a row, his behaviour was justified and it was ok for him to raise his voice (I didn't go claiming he is now ruining it for everyone, did I). But for me this behaviour is not allowed, because the difference is he did it all at once, for me there was a continuum, but it was within one week.

He then goes as far as claiming I'm thick for not getting this rule he has just set, and that people trolling me are right. Where did that even come from? How absurdly selfish is that?!, setting rules and calling others with names if they disagree. Getting backup from imaginary people.
He proceeds to put me down, subtly calling me with a couple of other names.
And then he says (again) this is it, he want's to break up. "I was intentionally provoking him by saying he resembles a guy I've deemed nasty. I did it on purpose, to be mean! And I was yelling"
So due to these things it was justified and okay for him to call me with names and try to provoke me with trolls. He admitted looking to provoke me on purpose, and it was what he thought I was doing the day before.
But I can sincerely say I wasn't. He claimed I'm judging the way he looks, when I've never done that and I never would. I've said he's got conservative shorts, but that's as far as I'd go.
It's all just lies.

Then he alternated with everything being ok and actually wanting to break up. Saying if I break up with him for a third time, he is never taking me back! I've done that yes, it was because he became addicted to computer games. But now he is like designing a bullet that's intended to hurt me as much as possible. He even says he wishes I'd go and leave him, like that's what he is hoping for.
It's obvious his stance is, he is better than me and I should be lucky to have him. Really?! this nasty person ridden with penalties, revenge and getting even with people.

At some point I get really fed up and yell from top of my lungs, "I've had enough! Enough with this $#%^!"

Later he is looking to hug me, but I don't want to. He never takes back what he says.

Have a ten rounds like this and you'll see why I find it difficult to trust him.

Dandy wrote: My therapist suggested maybe he does indeed want to break up, but doesn't know how to talk about it. But when questioned he replied, some days he does and some days he doesn't. Is this really what grown men are supposed to be like.