My head is a mess and things are horrible.

Yes.
That's the truth. Let me repeat myself.
My head is a mess and things are horrible.

I've said it.

Now I'm going to do something I should have done yesterday that will take about 10 minutes and go back to bed. I'll count that as a success. I got something done today. Count our successes, no matter how small. I've been here before.

Glad you're aware how it is. The one good thing about bipolar is it's in cycles, so the bad times aren't forever at least. Go try to sleep. Maybe watch a good movie, or listen to music if you need distraction. You got this! <3

Sometimes going back to bed is an act of self compassion. Sorry you're struggling. Change is inevitable. Wait. It'll pass. Hang on.

When I wake up halfway through the night, and can't get back to sleep. I turn a fan on, or something with a solid noise. Something that I'm not going to pay much attention to (such as television).

Sorry to hear that you're going through this. As Holodeck and ColouredLeaves both said, this will pass. Just try to remember that the best you can and hold on strong. You'll get through this.

skilsaw wrote:Yes.
That's the truth. Let me repeat myself.
My head is a mess and things are horrible.

I've said it.

Now I'm going to do something I should have done yesterday that will take about 10 minutes and go back to bed. I'll count that as a success. I got something done today. Count our successes, no matter how small. I've been here before.

How are you doing, skilsaw?

Definitely count completing a task as a success!

I had a therapist that told me if I’m not feeling well, don’t beat myself up over it. (This is a non-crisis scenario.). She suggested the following:

1). Wake up and GET OUT of bed...even just for a bit. (Note, I’m disabled so I don’t have to be anywhere in the mornings and I schedule any appointments in the afternoon.)

2). Make my bed.

3). Have morning coffee or tea (I have 2 cups of coffee). She says to eat a light, balanced breakfast, too. (I ignore this part because I cannot eat before the afternoon...just how I roll.). This is also when I drink water and swallow a handful of my daily meds. I set a timer to keep track, as I take meds 4x a day.

4) Hygiene...brush teeth, hair, makeup (for me, lol), dress for the days. I typically shower at night so this part is fairly quick for me. She said “comfy clothes” are fine, which for me means a tee, hoodie, black leggings, bootcut jeans or trusty Abercrombie sweatpants. I’m a girly-girl so if I feel like getting dolled-up with the makeup and clothes, all the better! This is usually only when I’m hypomanic.
So guys version....whatever you guys do, lol.

5). Look at my schedule. If I feel crummy, just do what HAS to be done, like an appointment. If no appointments, she ideally suggests I do TWO things. One, a task at home. The other task is what I cring at....she wants me to leave the house.

I have agoraphobia....so this is easier said than done. My boyfriend (yep, we are still together! ) helps me out tons with getting me meds, etc. Depending on how aim doing, maybe we will go to the library (I love reading) or make a *quick* run at the grocery store.

Most days, if I feel crummy, I don’t do that one. ^

In that case, she said no worries and just take it easy, as needed, for the day. Netflix marathon, read, etc.

Skilsaw, I hope you feel better and keep us posted. Good job on getting that task out of the way! Keep us updated on how you’re doing, ok?

eterea107 wrote:
How are you doing, skilsaw?

Definitely count completing a task as a success!

I had a therapist that told me if I’m not feeling well, don’t beat myself up over it. (This is a non-crisis scenario.). She suggested the following:...
Most days, if I feel crummy, I don’t do that one. ^

In that case, she said no worries and just take it easy, as needed, for the day. Netflix marathon, read, etc.

Skilsaw, I hope you feel better and keep us posted. Good job on getting that task out of the way! Keep us updated on how you’re doing, ok?

Thank you eterea.
All good suggestions, from the heart because you care and from your own experience.
Thank you again.

One day at a time... I took a short bike ride on Tuesday and Wednesday. Today it was pouring rain.

The commitment I'm absolutely committed to is my volunteering with the Cancer Drive Line. We drive cancer patients to the cancer clinic for their treatments, appointments with doctors or tests. I get to meet people facing a crisis of their own, hear their stories and offer support, sometimes by just being there for them. It makes me feel useful and gets me out of my head. I'm retired so doing this a couple times a week is easy.

Hygiene is important. I can let it slip but I like to believe it doesn't get too bad. putting on clean clothes holds in the body odor. (That's a joke. People that stink are hard to take. Clothes can really stink of they are not washed and dried properly. I don't judge those people though. Something is going on in their lives that makes them that way.)

Thanks all for your words of encouragement. I'm glad I've reconnected with the Forum. We're on this journey together.