Just diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder last month

Im feeling off , like i got the flu and even though my family says they understand I dont feel the fully do. I was just diagnosed with BD last month. and im on abilify but I just feel so useless like whats the whole point. im not gonna do anything crazy. I just wish it would all end though. Im gonna try to go into work soon. I almost wish I was manic right now. I also have a question did anybody else start to question their memories now ? As if your not sure if you were happy a certain day of just hypomanic . I feel like ive lost a sense of who I am nothing interest me.?

Happy is happy IMO. I have had a really great day so far today and I don't care if hypomania is contributing. I don't think it makes things not real. Just my opinion but I'm right (today anyway).

I've questioned my happiness many many times. It is so hard hard to determine what our baseline for happiness is. Is it just a genuine good mood or am I manic/hypomanic? It can be so difficult not knowing if our happiness is genuine or a manifestation of our illness. I'm so sorry to hear that you have, just recently, been diagnosed as I know how difficult it can be but at least now you can, hopefully, be treated appropriately. Hang in there and keep reaching out here. Hugs, if wanted.

Peace