Rough couple of days!

Hey everyone, its been a ridiculously long time since I've posted here. I have been having a difficult time as of late. I've been depressed then manic then depressed then manic, good old rapid cycling. The past week or so I have been in a nasty mixed state. I'm incredibly depressed but have a lot of energy and can't sleep.

Anyway, last night I started having hallucinations and delusions. I think there are demons in my closet that are trying to possess me and bring me over to the dark side. I hear growling type noises from my closet as well. The demons are telling me to kill myself (no worries I have no intention of listening to them). It terrifies me and it feels so real. I know that its not but I can't stop them from talking to me and I do honestly believe that there are demons there. I can hear them no matter where i am.

I've also been experiencing some really awesome (sarcasm) paranoia. I think the police are coming to get me, and I don't mean just 1 police officer in his car. Oh no I mean the full arsenal with SWAT and everything. I haven't broken any laws but that doesn't stop me from believing that this is really going to happen.

Anyway, these things always seem to happen on the weekends when I have no access to my pdoc or therapist. I have an appointment with my therapist on Monday, thankfully, and I will be calling my pdoc first thing Monday morning. In the meantime you will probably be seeing me around these forums often until then. I hope everyone is well and hanging in there.

Peace

I posted a reply to another post of yours, so I'm very glad to know you are seeking help today.

I'm so sorry that you are going through such a hard time. Please keep us updated on how you are doing.