stylegirl wrote:My pdoc has me on Adderall, Lamictal, and Gabapentin. The Adderall is for my Bipolar 2, not ADHD. (Another pdoc prescribed it for ADHD. It didn't seem to improve concentration, so I rarely took it.) Anyway, when I started with my current pdoc he asked, "What makes you feel better?" I said that Adderall seemed to help get me out of the house.
That was three years ago. I'm still stuck in awful depression so much of the time. In fact, right now I hardly do anything social...or even go to the market. Which leaves me isolated because I live alone. Which is depressing.
I periodically wonder, "Well, what is the Adderall accomplishing then?!" In fact, I wonder about my med cocktail a lot. I'm always asking him, "Is this as good as it gets?" I hate meds (don't we all?) I've tried so many. Seroquel, Geodon, Abilify, Lithium, Pristiq, etc, etc, etc... Because my 1st pdoc put me on & off things like crazy, it's very difficult to discern what might be effective!
Does anyone have experience using Adderall for their Bipolar? It sure isn't keeping the depression away. I am at such a loss.
Thoughts? How does everyone fine-tune their meds?
Okay, this is the second time I've tried posting this, so I hope it goes through this time as I was really angry that I didn't save it as I was typing

... but, eh, that's what I get for having very little experience in posting these kinds of things.
Wow, it sounds like you have been through the runger on this one. I have had my fair share of being on many meds (at one point I was taking 11 different ones a day, but only 7 of those were psych drugs) and although I may not be the same classification of Bipolar as you (I'm Bipolar Mixed), I do take Adderall, partly for the concentration, partly for the get up and go.
I guess my question to you then, is this:
Have you tried other avenues besides just medication? Yes, you do have Bipolar 2 and that is genetic, but the brain is still a physical part of your body and like your body, needs to be taken care of as well.
I had a longer response to this, earlier, but I'm gonna have to shorten it due to the nature of how easily these forums have a tendency to kick me out after 10 minutes of typing (and I have 2 cats on my lap, trying to lay on my keyboard), so I'll be concise:
1. Have you tried doing any sort of physical activity? I find that exercise, of any kind, even a short stroll of 30 minutes around a park each day, helps tremendously in lifting my mood. I think it has a lot to having dopamine being released into the brain ie. the happy drug your brain automatically makes.
2. Have you tried changing your diet up? I find that eating more whole foods and less boxed, premade items, helps improve your mood as well. Plus it's good for you overall health.
3. Do you have a counselor or therapist you visit? I have one and I see her about 1 or 2 times a month, give or take on time in work schedule. I know a lot of people find a big stigma to this, but honestly, if you have any sort of "mood" disorder (my doctor likes to call it move of an energy disorder; the energy levels affect my mood; I like this analogy better because it feels more accurate), it helps to have someone to talk to about what's bothering you. Some places give you group therapy and my counselor helped me a lot, especially after getting out of the rut I was in while I was in college. I was miserable and in a depressive state for 5 years because I felt like I could never do anything right and it took her seeing that to realize that that was a belief I had held onto since I was an early child and that I needed to let that belief go (and literally die) so that I could forgive myself for having failure at an academic standing. Also, a bunch of issues surrounding my folks and family and now I'm just starting to love myself again, despite never being able to get the acceptance I've always wanted from my family. It's been a long and arduous road, but I'm more positive because of it... and the irony, now my family even likes me better, but I'm not going to tell them why. I have to take care of myself first and I can't let them undo my base. I don't need them anymore and it's a big relief to get off my chest.
4. Have you tried meditation? Yoga? Either one helps, but I particularly find meditation helpful. Not just in concentration but also in retraining the mind. It's like a reboot button. Not everyone is born or brought up to be positive. Being Bipolar 2, yourself, I'm sure you understand and accept that depression is big portion of your life, but it doesn't have to be... not all the time, of course. I know trying to see things from another point of view in life can be hard, but the nice thing about meditation, is that it focusses on the here and now. What you can do, versus what you can't. It's Can Do. I tend to apply a lot of overlap of conflict resolution in my states, whenever I meditate (not always; most basic meditations deal with just focussing on one thought; just one; but having ADD, I have a tendency to wander, so I'm still working on this). It can be trying, but honestly many of us are not born positive. I believe it takes time and vigorous training to change one's literal mindset... it's like exercise for the mind. I find it hugely beneficial.
Also, it sounds like you spend a lot of time alone. Being Bipolar 2, I don't think that could be any good for you. People are social creatures by nature and being alone a lot can be damaging your mental health. Therefore, I would encourage you to branch out and find some fun activities to do. Be around some friends, or if you don't have a lot of friends, join a group of interest, sport, or volunteer somewhere. Find something you like to do. That is of the upmost importance. This encourages a positive shift in thoughts and brings joy. Be brave. The worst that can happen is that you don't jive well... then find another activity or group to join. Don't let fear hold you back from achieving happiness.
Good luck!