Self-confidence

When I was a kid I had a lot of self-confidence.

But that went away in middle school. I became self-conscious, and lost my self-confidence.

Right after college I had a manic episode. I could say a lot about that, but one thing I will say is this: I became confident. It was like all that inferiority stuff I had pent up for all those years came gushing out.

Mania and depression gone for now, but I am back to the lack of self-confidence. I just want to be my true strong self.

I think bipolar can mess with self confidence. Depending on mood state it can be misplaced or non existant or somewhere in between. I think that also adjusting to more "normal" mood eg after starting meds can cause a wobble in confidence too as it feels strange to not be cycling. So this all may be having an issue. However I also think that confidence can be greatly boosted by seeing a therapist as this can help you work on self esteem. I think it would be worth considering therapy if you have not already -I think it might help

Hugs

Cracked

Self confidence changes like the weather outside with me.

thebetterhalf wrote:Self confidence changes like the weather outside with me.

I like that quote.

I'm not quite that erratic, yet. My self-confidence&-esteem seems to be highly influenced by mental state though.. Down and I'd just burn&delete my "art" or sketches in general. Took me few years of advices and requests not to, so I've been saving them, for now. Higher than that and I may even feel safe enough to share what I've done.. --"

Bad considering the careers I'm aiming for are heavily based on portfolios, and when I don't feel like anything I've done are worth mentioning - not to mention sharing - my portfolios are quite empty..

Amusing thing is that I'm less depressed, going through my old sketches I've had some "damn, I did this?" feels.