by Caribee4me » Mon Jun 23, 2014 7:09 pm
I have BP1 and BPD. Before I went through DBT, there was no way I could identify the two separately. Now that I have skills to try regulate my interpersonal relationships, emotions, distress, etc, I can tell the difference. One does not lead the other...they exist side-by-side. If I am unmediated, my bipolar anger, psychosis, mania and depression tend to make it really difficult to use/access any skills, and my BPD gets worse. When well-medicated, I am calm and have clarity to see I'm still challenged in my ability to be interpersonally effective, I've got no identity, feel empty, bored and restless, but I can access my skills and try. The bipolar is really strong, but feels only controllable by meds, whereas my BPD needs skills. Medication didn't remove my BPD issues. No DBT skills are going to help me regulate my BP1 chemistry, which runs it's own course and makes me feel out-of-control and helpless if unmedicated. Finally, mania is a unique beast, and the $#%^ I do in that state is completely out-of-control and I just laugh at the idea of trying to regulate mania with behavior modification. Hope this helps!
Dx: BP1 mixed rapid-cycling, BPD, PTSD
Daily Meds: Latuda 120mg, Vyvanse 60mg, Intuniv 2mg, Quetiapine 200mg
PRN Meds: Alprazolam .5mg