Physical illness and mood

Hello,

I'm not entirely sure where to put this, but as it is at least tangentially related to mood, I settled on here.

I've been ill for the past month. Numerous physical ailments occurred simultaneously (adult-onset asthma, severe allergies, infection.) I have been on three different antibiotics (finally, I think the last one worked, although it has caused some unpleasant side-effects), a steroid inhaler, and two courses of prednisone. I have had a low-grade fever for three weeks, and I am very tired, which I believe is due to the asthma. I get sick frequently. Generally, I get odd, and sometimes almost unheard of infections (the last bizarre one was mastoiditis, which required hospitalization. The one before that was some kind of rare eye infection which left scarring on my left eye.) Apparently, nothing is really wrong with me, but I have a propensity to contract these infections about every 6 months. I take good care of myself; I eat well, I don't smoke, drink, or do drugs. I exercise. I don't know what else to do to avoid getting these illnesses.

Anyway, my problem is that this time, I feel like I just "gave in." I didn't fight feeling sick. It was like I had no energy to combat the illness and I think I got sicker than I usually get because I couldn't fight back. I didn't go to work for almost 3 weeks. My cognitive function was impaired, to the point that I got into a minor car accident due to just not thinking. I still don't feel "normal." I have to get a head CT tomorrow to make sure I don't have mastoiditis again. And more blood work. Ultimately, I am feeling like I should have handled this much better. Why did I let feeling sick take over my life? I'm used enough to feeling ill. It has never killed my spirit as much as it did this time. I feel like a quitter, and that is unacceptable.

Do any of you suffer from physical illnesses as well as mental illnesses? What is your strategy? I need to develop a plan of action so that this doesn't happen again. I will get sick again, that's a given, but I can't let it control my life. I don't have the resources to languish in bed. I have bills to pay. I need to be able to get back to painting and writing. I feel like I'm missing something, like there must be an obvious reason I just capitulated this time. I am nervous that this is indicative of an impending mood episode. Any thoughts or advice would be appreciated. Sorry for the lack of concision.

I think with that amount of physical sickness, I would become depressed.
If you google depression, you will find lists of the characteristics of depression.

But there is no need to diagnose yourself. Talk to your doctor about your mood.
The good news is you sound like a fighter. You are not giving in to your mood.
You are a winner.

Take care,

I have pernicious anaemia and regular anaemia. Pernicious anaemia is a autoimmune disease and as a result I have a poor immune system which means I pick up every bug going and they often turn severe like I had a simple ear infection which ended up collapsing my ear canal and I was hospitalised. Pernicious anaemia also comes with messed up stomach acid that means I'm unable to digest food properly so I vomit frequently and have very loose bowel movements combined with stomach aches constantly. I also suffer severe migraines about three times a week.

I guess as I'm in constant pain I've kind of got used to being in pain and it doesn't really bother me anymore. But it can sometimes make me depressed. Try not to beat yourself up about it and move on.

Thank you for your replies. I tend to think that I could have done better. Growing up, I had a lot of pressure to perform. That expectation has stuck with me.

I am feeling better today, except for residual pain behind my right knee (posterior cruciate ligament.) My temperature is still elevated, but not enough to be a true fever. I have gone to work this week, and next week I will try to work extra hours to make up some of the time I lost.

Thanks again for your encouragement.

Glad you are doing ok. Hang in there trooper!

This is my analysis of what happened to you:
Chemically the brain is affected by illness, even the common cold. That's why people feel miserable when they're sick. And so with the brain affected in this way, fighting back becomes difficult.

Psychologically, and physically, what you went through was a pretty major event. Your life was in danger from these multiple illnesses at once. And it seems like the treatments didn't work the first time. Three antibiotics? Before antibiotics infections were life-threatening and to have the first two not work would have been very scary. Not only your life, but your sense of self-integrity was threatened when you felt you just couldn't' fight yourself out of it.

Be gentle with yourself - I know next time you will not be so hard on yourself - it may take a little time, but you will make a full recovery. You are a fighter and a winner for surviving this ordeal.

I just want to add one more thing. One reason that otherwise healthy people become sick is due to high stress levels. The body has two systems - one system for taking action and the other for recovery. These are known as the sympathetic and parasympathetic systems. They will make your heart beat either slow, or fast, and affect all the organs of the body in similar ways. If you are constantly under stress your body will be in action mode and not in recovery mode. There will not be enough time for you to 'rest and digest' and repair the body if you are always in stress. And then you can become vulnerable to infections and the like.

I guess what I am trying to say is, in order to achieve more we sometimes have to stress less.

Thank you, bipolarbirdie. I think that that is a very fair assessment of what happened.The idea that I could be predisposing myself to illness such as infections and viruses by maintaining a constant level of high-stress seems plausible to me. I live in a high-stress environment. It would be prudent to learn how to better cope with this, as what I am doing does not seem to be working.

You are right in that my sense of self-integrity was compromised. I have a hard time with this feeling.

At this point, I believe the final antibiotic I was on took care of the infection. However, it has messed with the structure of my knee. I was thinking it was ligament pain, but it is more likely tendon pain, as this antibiotic cause cause issues with tendons, including rupture. I now have to decide how to handle that. Unfortunately, it is compromising the structural soundness of my knee--I am having problems with it buckling. It does hurt, but I can handle pain; the real problem is the instability.

I think the management of stress is much easier said than done. You can look at an internet factsheet about reducing stress, and follow the general idea, but I don't think this will address the problem. There are exercises for stress reduction and relaxation that can be learned from a psychologist, and these will also help.

For me, reducing stress has been quite a long journey involving both environmental and psychological factors. For me, I eventually found, I had some post-traumatic stress symptoms and I was constantly in fear of something. For other people it can be a factor of their personality, or it can be circumstantial, that is, in the environment, as you say is happening. I think a deep understanding of what is causing your stress will help. If it is the environment then breaks away from that environment, even a short break, will help.

I have been having some knee problems, which I believe have been caused by general inactivity and increased weight. When I sit down there is this horrible crunching sound coming from my kneecap. I've had some physiotherapy and do strengthening exercises at home, but I also have been taught some hydrotherapy exercises by the physio and I do these in a heated pool. The water supports your bodyweight and takes stress off the joints while you exercise.