Strange Thought Patterns

electricbipolar wrote:Thanks for the idea, but It's not that I don't believe my parents. They are not hostile. Actually they are very supportive. And they only tell me what I ask about. Sometimes if it was awful, all they will say is, "There's a reason you don't remember that. It's because you don't need to." And I'm okay with that. If it was that bad, I really don't want to know.

If I carry and record all of our conversations while I'm manic or in a mixed state or depression, I'm the one that would suffer, having to hear all the weird things that I said while I was out of my mind. I'd rather not have that on record, lol. Thanks, though, it was nice of you to help, handfull. I appreciate it!

You have no reason to believe your parents. No matter how close we are with someone, we should always remember, that everyone has their own interests and people often see us the way they want us to be, but not the way we are. Especially our parents, to them you are their daughter/son, rarely - you yourself.

In manic state we are very weakened and many people will exploit that.

You can see this as a blessing in a way, because you can observe and decide who really cares for you.

This is where the recording or documenting things (diary is an option, but your memory might not be fresh enough when you finally get the hold on a pen) come into play. Since recording will not tell us lies like some people do. Not to mention all the dellusions we tell ourselves.

But you must have a bit of bravery, since truth is not always present.



If you have a while to think, ask yourself, how come you turned bipolar in the first place if everyone around you is so kind and supportive?

Handfull wrote:If you have a while to think, ask yourself, how come you turned bipolar in the first place if everyone around you is so kind and supportive?

Is this a serious question?

@MikeHooty

I've been having everything you've described happen to me...

I had to drop out of college because I couldnt read books anymore, and that was three years ago.

do your words scramble when you drop your thought train? I keep repeating words or stumble over them, or I replace the words with something else. Like two nights ago, I meant to say "beef chow mein" but instead I said "china chow cow" which made my gf laugh hysterically in the restaurant. It was funny but my brain wasnt working too well that night. I had a hard time making sense.

Hey calo,

I'm so sorry you couldn't stay in college, that sounds awful. It's more like a complete blank for me. I'll be in the middle of a conversation and all of a sudden it will feel like I've woken up from a dream. I will have literally no idea what I was just talking about. I think what you're describing is more of a loose association or some sort of word salad. Are you on any medication for this? My doctor raised my risderdal not that long ago and that helped a significant amount though I'm still having problems. I told him I won't take any higher of a dose because I've gained so much weight already

Handfull wrote:
If you have a while to think, ask yourself, how come you turned bipolar in the first place if everyone around you is so kind and supportive?

Even though I wasn't diagnosed until the ripe old age of 33, I believe I have had bipolar since I was a child. It was the missing puzzle piece as to why I was always getting into messes in my life, even when I had good intentions. It explained so much.

There are so many theories as to what the root cause of bipolar is. My personal opinion is that I have bipolar due to a chemical imbalance in my brain. I don't believe that anyone else caused it. I was the one that drew the bipolar card out of the genetic deck. My deceased grandmother and one of my cousins has it, as well. I think even if I had the most perfect parents ever, I would still have bipolar.

My life has not been a cake walk and my parents haven't been perfect, but then again, I have never been a parent to a bipolar child. Both of my boys so far do not show signs of it. And I pray so much that they never will. I can only imagine the struggle that my own parents went through trying to figure out what was wrong with me. We have since had long talks and apologized to each other for things done years ago and we let it go. My mother is my best friend and biggest support now. My father is one of the people who really helped me get the help I needed during psychosis. I love them both dearly. This is not their fault.

Why do you think you have bipolar, handfull? If, in fact, you do believe you have it.