Tired of this

The older I get, the harder I am to treat. Meds help to a point and then fizzle out and I'm left having to have another adjustment. The only ones that work have to be kept at low doses because they negatively impact my physical health.

I can't make any kind of long-term commitments in life because chances are my mood with shift and I'll be unable to follow through. Sometimes the littlest things feel like a burden and I get stuck. It's hard to get into a professional job because one month I'll be social, the next wanting to hide in a corner. People think I'm weird. Heck, I am weird.

All these great changes are happening in my life and while I know it's good and things will improve, where is the happiness?? I should be ecstatic, but this feels like just another thing that will happen. I have a great night and then forget that happy feeling by the next day.

The antidepressants are a mixed bag. I can actually move around and do stuff now, but it's numbed me to the point of not feeling much else. This depression is becoming intolerable. Five months now, and I'm starting to forget what "normal" is like.

Sorry for the whine, and thank you if you've read it. There's so much going on in my life right now and I'm sick and tired of bipolar getting in the way of it all.

I'm very sorry to hear this, Ladyswan. Still hope that things will adjust for you, antidepressant-wise. I'm not going to make suggestions like "why not try..." -- you know best what you tried already and what remains to be tried.

I don't think you're whining at all; I think you're feeling overwhelmed. Changes are stressful, even great ones. This on top of being depressed and not able to get the meds right is just a very heavy burden to bear. You have all the right to feel overwhelmed.

And a personal thing -- I'm weird too -- I like weird people. I'm sure I'm not the only one. Not all jobs require 'normies'. I'll keep fingers crossed for a cool boss and interesting surrounding for you -- one that would understand some people aren't always social.

Big hugs from me.

So sorry to hear you're having such a tough time. I don't have much to say, I just wanted you to know someone's "listening". And I agree with oliveira, you're not whining! It's just that sometimes things get a bit too much, and you need to let it out a bit. I'm glad you did! Hang in there.

Thanks guys *hugz*

Yep at 42, I can certainly understand where your coming from. I am suffering in SAME way. I great for a while on a new meds then they fizzle out. I have almost given up on any idea of what "normal" is anymore. My work life or lack there off is trailing off to no mans land. It sucks and I am so sorry to hear that you are suffering as bad as you are.

Mark

I relate also. I did not want to try the old Lithium and Prozac combo just yet. You got to look at it this way though as hard as it is to see positive right now, times are always changing and and as time continues psychiatry will only keep advancing. Take care and hang in there.

Jake

Huge hugs to you ladyswan

I understand where you are coming from and I am sorry you are having such a tough time with the BP esp when you have such a lot going on in your life atm. I really hope things improve - perhaps spring might help?

Huge hugs

Cracked