Depression+Alcohol=Depression

I thought I'd share something with you that might be obvious to some but was something I never really thought about until my Dr told me. Once she did, I had a "duh" moment and it suddenly made perfect sense. It still took me a while to finally come to terms with it though.

Alcohol is a depressant and is one of the more counterproductive things someone who's suffering from depression can put in their body. At least the amount it takes to numb yourself every night. I definitely understand anyone who uses it for the whole numbing/sedation effect. I know I did and still do a lot of times. It's something that helps push away the depression, even if for a short time. I've never considered myself an alcoholic by any means but I went thru a long period of drinking myself to sleep pretty much every night. I'm the guy who whenever the fog got too thick would automatically start thinking about getting home at night and getting into the bottle. Whatever positive effect we all think it has for the short term is definitely wiped out by the next morning. Not only that but it contributes to putting you in a deeper hole than you would have been in anyway.

The first time I went to see a psychiatrist for some meds, I told her how much I drank every night. As I've mentioned in some earlier post, you gotta be totally honest if you expect any kind of help. Plus, its not like I had anything to lose. I really could have cared less if she some how wanted to judge me for what I was doing. I thought it was working for me and to hell with anyone that thought otherwise. Nobody knows what we're going thru except those that are going thru it too. Anyway, after I told her the amount, she said she wouldn't treat me unless I stopped. She said that I'd be throwing my money away on meds and sessions with her because alcohol contributes to a constant cycle of depression.

After talking with her it all made sense to the left side of my brain but the right side said some Jack or a bottle or two of red wine every night would help me sleep and help me forget how miserable I was. As I said, the next morning was just a continuation of the falling that wasn't getting any better. I told her
i'd stop just so she'd prescribe me the meds. I figured the meds plus the alcohol would be an even better sedative. As much as I came to rely on the drinking to get me through, I figured out pretty quick that I wasn't getting any better and needed something else.

Something else I noticed pretty quick after getting on the meds...Alcohol isn't tasting so good anymore. Not sure if theres something in the meds that doesn't mix with alcohol but its definitely not a psychological thing. Alcohol just tastes different. I've cut way back to just a couple of drinks with dinner every once in a while. I still have the occasional down night where I have a few too many just to sleep but nothing even close to before.

Like I said, this might be something thats pretty obvious to some of you but didn't really register with me at first. If you're someone that never really thought about this and are drinking a lot to numb the pain, just think about the cycle your putting yourself in. I know you're looking at ways to help deal with what your going thru. I'm right there with you. I'm not so sure that it would have even made a difference to hear this until I was ready to make a difference. This whole miserable condition we deal with takes a lot of baby steps to slowly get to even a manageable position. You never know when that one small idea will be the one that helps you decide to make that first step.

Just wanted to share with you...

Alcohol+Depression=Mania/mixed state, then Depression (for me)

I tend to be more manic when drinking. I feel free when intoxicated I just seem to be more vibrant, brilliant, talkative, honestly, I feel more human. I have no doubts, I walk on air, everything seems to flow with ease. I just enjoy the freedom of it. The dancing, the witty conversation, the things I would never do when depressed. I feel that the mania emerges as the depression barriers break down.

But all in all, I am less depressed in that instant. Sure, there are some negative effects: hypersexuality, delusions, blackouts, irritability, regret, energy loss the next day. But some nights are worth it. Some nights there's a real breakthrough in ideas or relationships or life purpose. Some nights life is worth living.

This should not encourage excessive alcohol use. I'm just stating an alternative opinion, based on my own experiences with the drug.

Hi

Im on day 8 of my meds and NO alcohol
...i have to say im gagging for a drink though.
I was drinking quite alot, if i was on a low i just got worse, if i was on a high...well, lol, most of the time it was fantastic, there wasn't anything i couldn't do, my sex drive went through the roof... but almost always by the end of the night i'd have a big row with hubby for one reason or another. I'd get irritated, irrational, jealous, nasty and loads of other things.
I know for sure i should stay off it but today im struggling, i feel fine in myself...just want a drink

Congrats on 8 days. Stay with it ... it gets easier and better. It's been over 6 months for me and it was one of the best choices I've made.

I still feel the urge, but remind myself that it might feel good in the moment, but will bring me down further in the long run. If you are having trouble stopping, look for a good 12 step group for support!

Kris

Hi Kris and thankyou, its nice to hear something positive.
Still fancying a drink but so far the angel sitting on my shoulder is winning and im not giving in to the devil on the other shoulder