help with bipolar psychosis

Hello,

I am currently under continuing disability review by the US Social Security. I've been receiving benefits for bipolar disorder since 2003 and have not worked since 1998. I filled out the 10-page form listing recent hospital stays and doctors' information. My most recent hospitalization (there have been many since a depakote overdose in February 2001) was in October 2012. I complained about hearing voices (more like ambient noise in stressful situations-especially when other people are around). I was taken off prozac (60mg) and zyprexa (5mg) and my geodon was increased to 100mg. I remained on 1000mg depakote. I had stopped taking all meds for two weeks prior to my recent six-day hospital stay. When I was depressed I stayed in bed 20 hours a day during that time and when manic I'd drive for hundreds of miles and gamble (I have a long history of high-stakes slot machine addiction and owe $131,000 because of it). The debt also depresses me and is made worse by the US government's inability to pass a budget that threatens my disability income.

Does anyone here have experience with bipolar psychosis? I was worried about really being schizophrenic but don't fit the criteria for that illness. I think I'm truly bipolar I rapid cycling but hearing voices is relatively new. I can't handle being around people. I dropped out of a community chorus because I couldn't stand the criticism from other singers and being around a big group for two hours at a time. It was just too stressful. I do play in a community orchestra because the maestro understands my illness and is supportive. I also sing with a church choir. That's it. The rest of my days are driving, sleeping, eating and going to the bathroom a lot (I just had a bout of colitis).

I'm a 51 year-old male who lives in USA Oregon, though I'm not from here (originally from Connecticut). I've drifted throughout my life but have been in my own apartment for over two years.
I'm also a colon/appendix cancer survivor (2008-09).

I would appreciate your comments.

Thanks to all who post here.

Barnett

Though I wouldn't say anything about the symptoms of bipolar are standard many of us experience auditory hallucinations, mostly in hearing voices or doors knocking and even though you may not have experienced them up until now new symptoms can pop up at any time.

If it helps a recent experience for me was non-manic visual hallucinations which is a non-standard symptom that has shown up 14 years after my first manic episode.

Just remember you are not alone and we offer any assistance or comfort we can offer.

(big hugs)

-X

some of the meds listed have a seizural type side effect that may explain your symptoms. it is similar to epileptic seizures that were brought on by viewing certain japanese animated cartoons with the sound levels turned up. i experianced this effect myself whilst taking a seratonin re-uptake inhibitor and a non-traditional use of an anti-psychotic in a clinical study. (one that failed because i wasn't the only one) most people don't think of this as having a form of seizure, but it is very much like what you describe and very uncomfortable. removal of oneself from the environment where sensory overload occurs brings near immidiate relief. sound familiar?

you are taking comparitivly a lot of meds, i don't want to second-geuss your prescribing physician, but i reccommend that you get your meds reviewed.

if i'm on the wrong track, then may i re-assure you that an occassional hallucination is no big deal. everyone hallucinates, most of them simply aren't aware that it is an illusion. one of the standard questions that psyche-docs ask is something like, "are you seeing anything that isn't there or hearing voices that don't come from a real person" there are a half dozen versions of this standard question, i'm sure you have heard at least one of them. this question allways gets me. if i am seeing or hearing things that aren't real, how the hell am i supposed to know? they seem absolutely real to me. if on the other hand, you are hearing sounds and seeing colors or patterns or shadows, and are fully aware that they are not real, then i suggest that you have some overactive neurons fireing somewhere and it is likely caused in part by a drug or combination of drugs.

Hi pudetat,

Thanks for the reply. My prescribing psychiatrist actually took me off half the meds I was taking in October and increased the geodon from 80 to 100mg. I went to him again a month later and complained about the voices and other symptoms. He didn't want to make any changes at that time since he had just adjusted my dosages. I'm scheduled to see him again on March 8th.

Yes, I can relate to your story. I can't even watch TV without getting triggered (I think a lot of "normal" people feel that way, too). So I sit at home alone and listen to electronic music on the computer most of the time and write to folks on-line, like here on the psych forum.

Take care,
Barnett

quality sleep on a regular basis, regular aerobic exercise (but don't over do it), and if need be, abilify. I remember physical exhaustion + sleep deprivation would really set me off in terms of psychosis. I'd say get on the eliptical or treadmill or something that gets your heart rate up for at least 35 minutes a day, maybe no more than an hour to start. Exercise in the morning or in the early afternoon. Doing so later in the day can keep you up. I think you'll find it helps clear your head in general, boost your mood, and make it easier to sleep well at night.

Also make sure you have electrolytes in your diet.