alexithymia

When I was in a support group that had lots of bipolar people, they seemed to be able to accurately and in a well-defined way describe when they had their manic states and when they had their depressive states. I on the other hand have had a difficult time with this, and sometimes I have a hard time even describing how I'm feeling. At best I can use weird words like spotty, just because those are what come to mind or bad because my emotion puts me in pain or good because my emotion makes me feel lighter. Is this really common in bipolar, or is it possible I have a misdiagnosis?

How many others struggle to label their emotions?

I have a hard time labeling my emotions, but I've been told that that may be due to my borderline personality disorder more so than my bipolar disorder (The lack of self identity stuff). While I definitely have distinct mood changes that are definitely bipolar, I also have quick mood changes that are the result of my Borderline personality disorder. As a result of my moods being all over the place I have a hard time figuring out what I'm really feeling. My therapist even mentioned this today when he was looking for some feedback on how things were going with therapy. I told him that he did really well reflecting back what I was trying to say, and he said that it's really hard for him because I don't give a lot with how I'm feeling because I don't often know how I'm feeling.

I know that this doesn't help much with your wondering if it is bipolar related, but I wanted to at least say that I can understand where you're coming from. Perhaps others can chime in as well.

I cant describe when im manic or depressed or something else either. Unless something points it out. I can describe anger but thats about it. My therapist or doc's used to ask how i feel and i would always answer , I Dont Know. Unless they pissed me off i just didnt know. Im just learning what depression feels like now and im been this way for over 30 years. I can be angery , yet depressed, yet manic all at once or change in a flash. How i feel isnt alwys the same when someone describes there version of a feeling. I've been told my feelings are wrong compared to others so many times, i have a hard time learning whats right or wrong anymore with feelings.

I have a very hard time with this too. I'm really giving serious consideration that I may be borderline, or bipolar and borderline, since my bipolar diagnosis doesn't explain the bulk of my symptoms.

I rarely know what I feel. I'm highly introspective yet perpetually confused with matters of the self. I seem to have no identity or "sense of self". Everything feels like different flavors of good, bad, or both, but I always feel empty. They say you can only go so low before you can only go up, but I borrow shovels and dig myself deeper.

I struggle with this myself. Last time I talked to my pdoc, I told her that my insight was bad because I just can't tell when I'm having an episode. I can only figure it out hindsight. But then am I blaming a label for stuff I should be blaming myself for? Often times I wonder if my bipolar DX is accurate or at least telling the whole picture.