Am I bipolar?

Hello
I am new to this forum. But after doing research on this disorder, I think I may at least be suffering from cyclothemia or a milder form of bipolar disorder. Im female, early 20s.

This summer, I got dumped by my 4 month boyfriend. he was my first. Of course it's normal to be sad about an event like this. But I was very depressed for about 3 months. When I was with him, I was so happy, it was the happiest feeling I ever felt. I became so depressed when he dumped me. I could not stop ruminating the situation in my head and feeling low and would feel anxious and sad about the situation and really talked about it way too often. My self esteem was very low.

Somehow I began feeling better in the fall, but not for long. I was often In the depressed spectrum of feelings. But suddenly, I began feeling very motivated and happy. I was seeing a psychologist at the time all summer since I was depressed and he basically thought I was anxious and depressed. But I stopped seeing him because he felt I was okay since I became very motivated, I suddenly decided to join a soccer team, and went and bought all this equipment. But this happy feeling did not last long.

I became depressed again. Then suddenly for about 2 weeks I was extremely motivated about all kinds of things. I felt really good about myself, I felt like nothing was bothering me, I had this grand self esteem, and I went into suddenly this new hobby with hypnosis and reading all kinds of books on psychic stuff and I was really just happy. I suddenly wanted to buy myself a violin and a cello.

Then suddenly one night this "happy high feeling" just crashed down. I became very sad suddenly and cried, and the next day I was very irritable , angry, and depressed about everything. I don't remember how long this sad feeling lasted, but I would say for about a week.

Then recently, I became very happy again. I started taking 5 htp supplements, which is suppose to increase serotonin levels in your brain, but obviously I don't think it could start working right away, but suddenly I became very happy again and nothing was bothering me. I suddenly went and bought all christmas presents in one day, I would have a lot more energy and do so many things in a day but I noticed I was just a bit more irritable than usual, I was very social, I would have these flashes on what I want to do ,all kinds of careers I want to do, (im soon graduating from university). This lasted for about 2 weeks.

Suddenly last night coming home from my cousins after christmas in the car I was just becoming more and more irritable for no reason. When we got home I suddenly had this anger explosion/outburst at my father for absolutely no reason. I punched his arm a few times and called him all kinds of mean things. The only reason I was angry was because I kept thinking of this fight we had a very long time ago. When I went to bed I felt very depressed and cried. Ive had a anger outburst with my mom too once in the past, for no reason, I was not violent though I would just call her names.

This morning I woke up just feeling numb. I don't know what's wrong with me. I remember about a year ago, I suddenly became very social and extremely talkative. I use to be a very shy girl socially, but suddenlly I would just snapped out of this shy person I use to be.

am I bipolar?

Hi my Friend. I can't diagnose as I have no degree, but you sound a lot like me pre-med and I still am the same way currently. I can't tell you, but it does sound a lot like Bipolar. A brain is just like a car, sometimes you just need a tune-up. My joke of the day.