To those who believe in God...

I believe in God, satan, Heaven, and hell. Growing up I went to church ALL THE TIME!!! I haven't gone on a regular basis for prolly 7 years now! My faith in Him has faded and become questionable at times. A few nights ago I had my first "audio hallucination" where my ears were SO loud that I felt as if I had to cover them! I believe in demons and since that night I can't get it out of my head that maybe I just have a demon inside me that is trying to come out! Typing it out makes me feel even more crazy; even though I believe in them. I don't know though if it's truly by faith I believe that or by me being crazy! I went in for drugs for my bipolar due to my paranoia. It was getting really bad, to the point it was affecting my life. So I am now on Lamictal 25mg which ringing ears is a side effect. I have been tempted to quit taking it since I feel more crazy now than before and just try and go hard core to church and see if that "heals me" or if I'm to stick with the meds and just wait it out. I've been to churches that believe that depression and mental illness are just people with a stronghold of satan on them. I just feel so confused. Any advice, thoughts, suggestions, ANYTHING is welcomed. Thanks in advanced.

Hello 2cool4u

My beliefs on God fall into what's called Deism. I believe in the Deity but I don't necassarily believe he/she you know, intervenes in human affairs. It's the only way I can make sense of why I have this illness.

Anyways think of this. Sometimes, any organ of the body gets a disease or illness. The brain is no different than the heart, or the liver in this regard. So it makes sense within nature that our brains would get a disease. That doesn't make us demon children or demon posessed. This just means we have an illness. So you are going to be ok with some work and the proper medication. Just like someone has to shots for diabetes or blood pressure medicine. It will be ok, I highly doubt you are demon posessed.

take care

I'm a (now rarely) practicing Christian who absolutely believes that spirits (both good and evil) are real, and impact the world in tangible ways. Having said that, these beliefs tend to be tied pretty closely to my moods. There is almost always a rapturous component to my hypomanias, and I'm left with a lot of "divine revelations" about my life that I have to try and sort through. Mixed episodes and depression come with intense fears that I'm under attack by demons I attracted during a period in my life where I practiced a pagan religion. My spiritual director says it's possible that my illness comes with a "gift" of increased spiritual insight. She also says that sometimes "crazy is just crazy."

My personal belief is that it's probably a bit of both, and I try to integrate that belief into the greater scope of my faith. My only real advice would be to do what you need to honor your faith -- but be mindful of the fact that religious delusions are pretty common for some people with bipolar. In fact, waiting for your dosage of Lamictal to get to an effective level might help clarify things a lot.

I think religion can provide a lot of guidance and stability and certainly help keep you spiritually healthy which has a big impact on the course of all our respective struggles with bipolar.

With that in mind, it's important to be as rational as possible. There is a lot of evidence that demonstrates that treatment with drugs and/or therapy combined with an emotionally and physically lifestyle will keep us the most stable. There is not reliable evidence to suggest that problems like bipolar have supernatural causes nor is there evidence that religious acts such as exorcism provide any benefit. By the same token, using church as a place to connect with your sense of spirituality, as a supportive community, to seek guidance and things like that are fantastic.

Drugs alone won't work. Church alone won't work. If used correctly, they can be highly beneficial tools.

Just keep trying things that have been shown to work and eventually things will improve.