In the Syrup or tar!!

I don´t really have any idea why I am writing this post. It´s not as if it is going to make much difference. But maybe I will have a moment of clarity from writing this and feel a bit better for doing it, one can only dream.

I was only recently diagnosed as bipolar. I am supposed to be starting on meds, but there has been a hold up waiting for my blood test to come back so that I can get prescribed something suitable. Most winters I suffer with symptoms of depression and feel particularly ill. Unfortunately, I seem to be out of time and the depression has hit with a vengeance!!

Basically I am struggling to cope. I have a teenage son and need to be ok for him. But it just is not happening. I feel like I have the flu.. every bone aches, I struggle to put one foot in front of the other. Making us food is a chore. I am surrounded by death, an acquaintance died of cancer last week and I have been reading about the deaths of someone I have never met but is in my circle. I have become obsessed with the thought of death.

I am supposed to attend college, and meet someone once a week in relation to the course that I am doing. I just don´t have the energy and am really worried about not making it or letting these people down. Worse still is the fact that if I don´t attend my class, I will give myself a true going over for being so useless and weak.

I am home alone at the moment, my partner works away and will not be over the moon to discover that I am not cutting the mustard at home. I cant get to see my doc, because she is nearly 2 hours drive away as she is the only doc who speaks English nearby (ha nearby!!) So I have to wait till I can get a lift. She has talked about putting me on anti psychotic meds for the depression, but I am also pretty concerned about taking these after reading up about them on line. Will they help at all with depression ?

Thanks for reading xx

My psychiatrist wanted to put me on seroquel for my depression (I'm not sure if it's classified as an anti psychotic but it's prescribed to treat psychosis and mania) I refused since I had taken the seroquel for a psychotic episode and while it did the trick for the psychosis it actually made me very depressed.

I ended up taking lamictal for my depression and it worked wonders, I can't take anti depressants because I will become manic but I would think if you have never experienced mania than an anti depressant would be more appropriate.

Having said that I am not a medical professional of any sort, I'm just relaying my experience to you.
I'm sorry your depression has become so crippling. It really sounds serious and I hope you can find the right meds for you and a way out of that black hole. Take care. Be well.

I was put on an anti-psychotic (Seroquel) to try to get me out of my last severe depression. It really worked, I improved pretty rapidly on it, too. Everyone is different, but I do think sometimes anti-psychotics can work well against depression or to stabilize mood... If I were you, I'd try a mood stabilizer first if you haven't already, like Lamictal, that one usually helps good with BP depression.

- EGD.

Thanks for that, I am looking forward to getting to speak to my Psych on the 28th and see if I can make some steps towards feeling better. In relation to the anti depressants, I was previously misdiagnosed with clinical depression as I only ever went to the doc when I was feeling low. I spent 7 years trying out different anti depressants, one made me have the symptoms of mania and the others just did nothing to make me feel better at all. I am just sick of having this mood and the general feeling of being unwell. .. thanks again.