new member. what can i do???

Im a new member here - after spending a lot of time looking for some advice. I've read all the information in the other posts but im struggling to convince myself i can make it work.

I'm a 22 year old man whose always struggled with my weight - i've been on diets since i was 14/15 and during that time my weight has varied wildly. I've always associated being happy with the times i was slimmer. Recently i am noticing binge eating much worse than before - I eat meals when my partner goes home for the evening even if we have eaten together a few hours before and i will lie about how much i have eaten to people.

I feel like i need to lose weight to be happy. But i know i can't do it while I feel like this. I know all the advice says not to diet while trying to stop binging but i feel like i can only be happy if im losing weight. im 22 and feel like I have wasted my younger years by being overweight and need to sort it asap so i dont waste any more time.

Hi, miller! You have to treat both the binging and the need to diet because it's the only way you can feel good about yourself. I can relate to feeling like you wasted your younger years. You have to try to get healthy with the help of a therapist, though, dieting and focusing on being thinner is just part of the problem. You'll reach a place where you look nice and feel better too, eventually.

Hello Miller,

This is not something you can simply do by yourself without some guidance, either from a therapist or from a program that can take you through it step -by-step. Weight issues like you describe have a psychological origin, and are set off in waves as circumstances in your life change and trigger old unresolved developmental problems. You are right to try to master this now at your age, but mastering it means digging into the routes and having more self awareness and self knowledge. Don't fool yourself into thinking a few tips are all you need.

Roger Gould, M.D.

http://ShrinkYourself.com
http://facebook.com/ShrinkYourselfCommunity

Hi Miller,

I completely relate to your struggle.
I suffered with an eating disorder for over 10 years, including extreme binge eating, overeating and bulimia.
I can definitely say that diets contribute to the problem and they set up an obsession and craving.
There are ways to get help though - without dieting and having the obsession removed.
It comes down to treating the emotional reasons as well as changing your behavior - especially getting rid of triggers like diets, weight loss sites, obsessive planning of food and restricting.
Complete recovery is possible - I have been recovered now for 5 years and have not had an urge to binge, purge, overeat or starve. I have complete freedom from the eating disorder.