Boyfriend doesn't believe I'm a Binge Eater

Hello all,

I'm posting to this forum because I have always struggled with my weight, and I can vividly remember being ashamed of my stomach as early as elementary school. I have always loved to eat, a lot. I am 20 years old. The first time I "defeated" my binge eating was this fall, but I actually just replaced it. I was using cocaine, adderall, vyvanse, and marijuana regularly. After the semester ended and I cut the drugs, I started binging again- worse than any other time in my life. I quickly gained about 30 lbs, shooting me into a downward spiral because I was SO THIN during the fall (due to the drugs/starving)...Now I've gotten back with my ex boyfriend who was with me for about two years previously but I never disclosed my issue because I am simply embarrassed.

I am in therapy and am on Prozac 10mg- this was supposedly going to curb my binging behavior, but i have not seen any success- besides nausea.

Last week I finally had to tell my boyfriend about my binge eating, because my therapist let me borrow a book called Trim Life. He has seen me eat a lot of food, which to him seems normal because he can eat a bit too. However, I have never binged in front of him or told him when I have one when I am alone because it makes me feel disgusting. I already feel like I am unattractive in his eyes. Lastnight I binged right before he came home from work- and wanted desperately to say something but just couldn't...I really want to beat this thing. I've not been diagnosed because I have just started therapy and very recently disclosed the issues to my doctor, who in turn ordered bloodwork. If all is well, I think she will take the next step in diagnosing my behavior and upping my medication.

Do I fight this alone and just continue hiding it? He knows I am depressed, but I dont think he wants to believe i am a binge eater- which is my fault, but i see no way to tell him without hating myself. What do i do?

Did you know that vyvance has been approved as one form of binge eating treatment?