(First Post) An Overview of my Overeating.

Hello,
Thank you greatly for taking the time to read this, as this is a nerve-racking and shameful secret of mine that I am not too reluctant to share.
I am a junior in college and have a binge eating/ compulsive eating/ emotional eating disorder that began about two years ago. My whole life I have been extremely active, being involved in sports ranging from cross country to field hockey and martial arts, and I also play tennis and was on my college team.
I never had an issue with food or overeating before. There were times in my youth like any growing kid where I went a few pounds heavier than I would have liked but with all the exercise I easily shed them off. I'm 5'5 and my lightest weight in high school was *mod edit* which was very skinny with all the muscle weight I had attainted.
I experience a very bad break-up the beginning of my freshman year of college and would not eat for days due to a lack of hunger from my frantic emotions. It wasn't until about 6 months later that I began to very much enjoy food again, which was mostly encouraged by my friends who would suggest the midnight runs to the donut store or the trips to Ralph's grocery store where we would buy bags upon bags of chips and candies. It never occured to me that high levels of food could actually affect my body negatively because it had never been an issue before, but at this point I began to take my binging to a whole new level. It would begin with boredom, opening a bag of chips. Next the crackers. Next the chocolate. Next the fruit strips. On and on and on, shoving my face trying to taint one taste with the flavor of another. It would go on until I would have a belly ache or end up in tears, sitting by the toilet wondering what had possessed me.
The binges began with boredom, then with sadness, loneliness, stress, anger and mostly every emotion that caused me to feel a lack of control. These binges have carried on for the last two years and I have reached 150lbs but feel this number is still rising. (I haven't checked in a few days because I am too scared too).
My diet has gone in every direction from not eating for days to eating everything in my sight, spending hundreds of dollars trying meal replacement shakes only to gain more weight, substituting "healthier" foods for "unhealthy" ones and over-eating the healthier choices to compensate for the lack of unhealthy eats.
I go to a gym and love to exercise but although many say that exercise keeps them from binging, I feel it does the opposite for me. After a good workout I go home and think I can eat anything and everything because exercise is supposed to burn all of your fat, right!? HAHA.
I feel extremely lost and completely out of control, but what bothers me the most is that I know it is just a habit and something I do to compensate for the negative emotions! It honestly feels like a drug when I eat all of my favorite foods over and over again because it causes me to forget about all of my problems, my loneliness, the stress of work and school, and the sadness in my heart.
There has to be some other type of activity that keeps me from abusing food to this extent and I am so desperate to find out what that is.
Open to any ideas.

Also, I get scared that I'll never get to eat a certain food again or will regret not having eaten it later so I will eat ALL of this new food even if I am stuffed. I had pasta for a late lunch today which held me off for a few hours later, but my family suggested going to dinner when I was still completely stuffed. We went to my favorite restaurant and ordered my favorite meal and I ate the WHOLE plate of noodles and pork even though I was not hungry at all, but felt I would not be able to have another opportunity to eat it! Then we picked up movie theatre popcorn and went home to watch a film and though I was still over-stuffed now I ate the delicious popcorn that we do not get so frequently. To top it off, my father purchased beef jerky (which is a special occasion in my home) and I nearly finished the bag. Wasn't hungry one bit at the start of it. Now I am ashamed.

Hello

It is crazy how much I see myself in your story. The active life-style, the sports, the break-up,...
Now, before I tell my story: are you still active on this forum? And how is it going now?
I've loved food my whole life. I love making new combinations, new flavors and I love trying food of diffrent cultures,... But a year ago I realised I was obsessed with food and that sometimes I couldn't get enough. The overeating became more often and often and I felt like an addiction was sneaking on me.
To tell the short version: the last 3 months, I've had a great time. My body was sliming and I was getting stronger and fitter (running and fitness) and I wasn't obsessed with eating. I felt great, getting confident and happy.
But... There's always a but... The last 5 days have been a relaps (sorry if my English is bad, I'm Dutch), I had binges again and now I feel like the last 3 months were for nothing...
I don't know how to get motivated again. I don't what my triggers are, don't know where to begin...

Can you help?