BDSM

I find them all over the place. I'm not actively looking for them, but the dirt comes out once the subject of sex comes up. What section of Craigslist are you looking in? The Erotic Services section? There's always a fee there. Try the regular relationship section for women looking for a f.u.c.k-toy if you want to be dominated. Boston college girls? I'd rather look at University of Vermont (in that area anyways).

There's nothing in VT. It is a sexual wasetland! For hookers and dominatrixes anayway. Must go north to Montreal!

Dom chicks are everywhere. They're just undercover. Most girls seem a bit shy about this stuff at first. It might take a month before she tells you she wants to tie your dick up like a pretzel so you can't cum until you're allowed. You have to peel them layer by layer; like garlic.

Or you could just pay for it. Oh, a girl I know told me I should go to a sex club. Maybe you should look into one of those.

I ALWAYS have to pay for stuff. Even ordinary stuff. But really - there's not much of that going on around here. There were a few of those asian massage places a few years ago, but they got raided and shut down.

Your location - "Vestibule of Hell", is starting to make more sense now.

I don't know why, but it seems that the women I'm finding who are into dominating fit into the BBW category. But everything changes when you start looking at the European ones; they are HOT!

We should take a trip to Europe one of these days, P.

Montreal is a lot closer. I'm not big on the idea of flying - especially over that deep dark ocean.

Parador wrote:Montreal is a lot closer. I'm not big on the idea of flying - especially over that deep dark ocean.

You'll be racking up frequent flier miles once a European dom gives you the spanking you deserve. I guarantee....

I don't know how populace the city you live in is, but I would suggest getting involved with the physical BDSM community. Places like fetlife.com are great places to find where people are meeting.

I'm a dominant woman who can never find a submissive man. *sigh* I've lost lovers because "I'm too kinky".

BDSM has gone somewhat mainstream lately, and you would probably be shocked at how many couples engage in it to some degree. The BDSM community has a mantra of "Safe, sane, and consensual." That is the basic tenent. The website alt.com has a pretty active BDSM community all over the world.

That said, one must be VERY careful when venturing out to explore that subculture, especially if it involves any interaction with strangers.

While there may be actual danger in the sense of sadistic psycopaths, the more common danger is that of personality disordered individuals (usually a NPD or ASPD) who prey upon other disordered individuals' weaknesses (frequently co-dependents) and ultimately coerce them into a practice that is not something they would normally do. The victims of this suffer grave consequences when they are ultimately devalued and discarded by a person who only sought to gain gratification via objectification and humiliation.

Within the context of a consensual couple, although it doesn't "float my boat," I see nothing wrong with it. According to what I have read from those who practice it, BDSM is supposed to be the ultimate "trust" that a couple can express in a relationship.

For those of you who enjoy sex only when there is a violent aspect, this is not BDSM...and is actually not even sexual in nature. The stimulation is in the act of torture or subjugation and has deeper psychological connotations.