Hello everyone. I have some questions with regard to BDSM I'm new to it and confused about what I'm feeling right now.
I fantasize about being dominated, tied up, whipped etc. I have rape fantasies as well. The real turn on for me is the idea that I can't be "broken" by a man regardless how dominant his is. I have someone in mind he excites me because he's powerful and well kinda dark but he keeps it well hidden. We've been friends for a while.
Recently we experimented with ravagement. I wanted a full on fight. It was intense for me but I was left confused. He said that he wanted this experience to be totally for my pleasure. He says this a lot that his only concern is my pleasure. I guess that's a part of the dynamic I don't understand because down deep I want him to be doing it for himself.
We talked afterward and he told me he wants to watch me have sex with another man because by watching my face while someone is maybe giving me something he can't -he would "own" me, all of me.
Someone please explain this. He confuses me because he's being evasive. He wants to play with binding, and whipping so I have assumed that this is how a dominant male expresses. The watching part is confusing - if any dominant man out there can explain to me I would be grateful. What is the turn on with watching a woman who is into you, have sex with another man. How is this a way of possessing her?