Any Extroverted AVPDers??

I think "drained" would be a good way to describe how I feel after "playing the role" for too long too. Which is why I can't make friends; the role is too draining to keep up for that long, and if I show the real me (in my mind) they won't like me, so I retreat.

Also, when I'm in the role I feel fake, non-descript and glib. Like a car salesman. It's actually kind of dispiriting, but it's a powerful defensive tool for an avoidant to have.

I can really relate to this! When I was very young, I was so incredibly shy I would hardly say "boo" to anyone, lol! As I grew older, some of the shyness left me and I learned to put on a good act of being extroverted. However, I seem to want to be alone more now than when younger, hate groups of people, etc. But I have no problem playing the extrovert now, in many instances, though not all.

Don't blow the extroverted definition with a nuclear bomb. Seems like you need to talk talk talk or be doing crap with others in order to be extroverted these days.

Pretty sure introverts can speak a lot. Equally to extroverts. I know I can. I just dislike certain social setting. Today we had to take a big picture because I'm gonna graduate soon. The whole 12th grade classes were there. I thought it was a missed opportunity to blow some stuff up.

Perhaps that's because they had to act like 6 year olds and could not sit properly. I dunno. Lots of still in kindergarten types in my country. Crappy place.

I’m AvPD and I’m extroverted.

It manifests by, essentially, me telling people very personal pieces of me in N effort to reject them
Before they reject me /or/ by me trying to alter my personality to please people so they can’t reject me... it’s exhausting. A lot of times the “people pleasing” version involves footing n introverted appearance to others, which very much isn’t me. So then I just never initiate contact so I don’t have to exhaust myself so often, but then when I’m alone I feel like I’m going crazy because I need to be around people.

I’ve learned to be happiest around a small group of people who I trust not to judge me, or if they do to only do so in a loving way. But there’s still a part of me that wants to throw parties and make tons of friends and feels isolated.