Mental Injury

And while we're, despite my objections, on the AvPD versus schizoid thing, let me say this. Some AvPDs admit there are people in their environment they wish they could get closer to.

I #$&^% hate people. There is no one I want to get closer to.

If I won the lottery (depite never playing it) I would QUIT my job immediately after getting the $ in the bank and I would NEVER deal with another *&^#$ human again.

That sounds schitzoid with avoidant coping techniques. I say I'd like to be a recluse, but in reality, I crave relationships. I think I spend probably 3 hours a day minimum actively longing to be with someone.

That is ME.

And you'll have to argue the diagnosis with my ex quack. I could not care less.

The day he told me I was on the phone with him and angrily asking what he had been doing to help me. It was years into the relationship. I demanded to know if he even had a diagnosis for me. That's when he dropped the schizoid bomb.

He didn't explain it and I didn't ask him. Of course, I went and looked it up in the DSM III. It was an insult. I ignored it and forgot about it until a couple years ago. That's when, in retrospect, I realized he had, in probably a paint-by-numbers way, got it right.

I definitely have never been AvPD. But I met more than the criteria to be labeled schizoid a couple decades ago.

Now I am just one pissed off sick of it all recluse wanna-be. But you wouldn't know it to see me in real life. I can pass. And I hate every &*^#$ minute of it. But I know what my goal is now.

[/tantrum]

I "present well" too. Until I have a breakdown. I had one last August and I've been having aftershocks since then. It's because I've been working so hard which causes more stress, but I think I'm improving, so give it a few years and I will probably (was going to type might, but it didn't feel true) be in a better place.

green_tea wrote:"Too sensitive?"
Ugh...

Do you not know that it has been the "too sensitive" who have moved the human species from...well wait a minute... the human species is still as violent, ignorant, greedy, selfish and stupid as ever...

But there used to be some composers, authors, artists, martyrs and such who seemed to demonstrate the human species had some capacity for being more than that... And those were the "too sensitive" people...

Proud to be a "too sensitive" non-breeder

This seems like a good example of "splitting". "Too sensitive" = good. The movers of the human species. Mostly all dead now, though. "The rest" = greedy, ignorant, causers of war, breeders.

In reality there are plenty of composers, authors, artists, scientists, etc. who are moving the human species, still alive today, who would do not fall in the "too sensitive" category.

green_tea wrote:Again. Just as a fair skinned kid needs to be protected from the sun, so an HSP/INFP/similar kid needs protection from the insensitive majority. If that is done, no personality disorder will happen. That’s all I was trying to get across.

Fair skinned/sunscreen is a good analogy in some sense. You do want them to have the protection but you don't want to keep them completely lock inside. OTOH, even with sunscreen they are going to have a lower limit to the total amount of time they ought to spend in the sun. In extreme cases, no time in the sun might be the only possibility and then you have to make the best of that situation.

The sunscreen analogy, however, is not good in the sense that you can't change the tone of your skin very much (tanorexics notwithstanding ), but through gradually increased exposure most avies probably can make great strides in how sensitive they are to other people.

In my case, when I was young I probably needed to be taught a better means of dealing with my peers rather than "hiding" from them. With the right/most parents I probably would have avoid AvPD altogether. Now there's a good chance I would have ended up ASPD instead, it would have been tricky I think for any parents to get things just right for me.

AlAtBar wrote:

green_tea wrote:"Too sensitive?"
Ugh...

Do you not know that it has been the "too sensitive" who have moved the human species from...well wait a minute... the human species is still as violent, ignorant, greedy, selfish and stupid as ever...

But there used to be some composers, authors, artists, martyrs and such who seemed to demonstrate the human species had some capacity for being more than that... And those were the "too sensitive" people...

Proud to be a "too sensitive" non-breeder

This seems like a good example of "splitting". "Too sensitive" = good. The movers of the human species. Mostly all dead now, though. "The rest" = greedy, ignorant, causers of war, breeders.

In reality there are plenty of composers, authors, artists, scientists, etc. who are moving the human species, still alive today, who would do not fall in the "too sensitive" category.

Well... have you looked at your society, lately? Yes, I view sensitive people as better than non-sensitive. Perhaps I only do that to counteract the extreme bias and discrimination of my society against the sensitive? And I made a mistake in using the word “move” because what I meant was more about how sensitive people demonstrate the supposed “higher worth” of humanity that all the non-sensitive types love to boast about. And, to clarify, I do not believe humanity has "higher worth."

And, again, how sensitive is “too sensitive?” I know that as a child I was repeatedly belittled for being “too sensitive.”

I have a fairly strong tolerance of solitude (the three closest people I have to being called "friends" couldn't make time for me this weekend. Which makes me suspect that they really don't like me that much but ah well. Usually this would cause a AvPD or even a "normal" person a lot of distress. But not me. I watched some UFC on Saturday and Final Fantasy XIII is keeping me company. I'm more of a schizoid when it comes to "hanging out"). But I do yearn for a significant other. I feel that the right woman would make me feel a lot happier. Even a casual fling or one-off with a trustworthy girl (emphasis on trustworthy. This is why I'm afraid of say going on adultfriendfinder to find something) would do a lot of good for me right now. Not prostitutes though. Unlike Parador and my uncle (who plans on going to Cuba this week. No doubt he'll be using the "services" of the local prostitutes there), I'm not keen on the idea. It's not the "getting off" part that I'm really craving. Because I'm pretty sure I'd feel like $#%^ after visiting a prostitute. My craving is more psychological. That feeling of being desired and appreciated. Heh I sound like a girl. lol.

[quote="techaddict"]I have a fairly strong tolerance of solitude (the three closest people I have to being called "friends" couldn't make time for me this weekend. Which makes me suspect that they really don't like me that much but ah well. Usually this would cause a AvPD or even a "normal" person a lot of distress. But not me. I watched some UFC on Saturday and Final Fantasy XIII is keeping me company. I'm more of a schizoid when it comes to "hanging out"). But I do yearn for a significant other. I feel that the right woman would make me feel a lot happier. Even a casual fling or one-off with a trustworthy girl (emphasis on trustworthy. This is why I'm afraid of say going on adultfriendfinder to find something) would do a lot of good for me right now. Not prostitutes though. Unlike Parador and my uncle (who plans on going to Cuba this week. No doubt he'll be using the "services" of the local prostitutes there), I'm not keen on the idea. It's not the "getting off" part that I'm really craving. Because I'm pretty sure I'd feel like $#%^ after visiting a prostitute. My craving is more psychological. That feeling of being desired and appreciated. Heh I sound like a girl. lol.[/quote]

Haha, I love it .
Embrace the sensitivity.
Sensitive people rock!