I disgust myself

This has turned out to be a rather active littler topic since I was last here. I sure hope that eeverything is okay with you, Steve, and please be aware that I'm very happy to speak to you off the forum if you wish. Do'nt ever feel that you have no-one to turn to. I'll give youmy email address if you wish and we can talk there. Just please don't ever feel that you're alone. There is always someone to talk to.

Kevin

Thanks for caring, being isolated for so long I appreciate that somebody is there to listen.

Why is it if you mention suicide you get modded i dont get it. Its only natural, your born and eventually you die. So why is it so bad to quicken the process if that is what you feel you want to do? Wouldnt it be worse to watch someone suffer? There isnt a cure all for mental illness so what works for one person might not work for another. What if you have exhausted all other options, what are you left with? As far as AvPD goes a lifetime of loneliness and depression is what awaits you.... I wouldnt wish it on my worst enemy.

I love fantasizing about my death, its the only time i feel true happiness. Just the fact that i know that there will be an end to all this is very comforting to me. Dont know why im wasting my time typing this though because im sure in a press of a mods button it will be deleted.

the pain wrote:Why is it if you mention suicide you get modded i dont get it.

You have the right to talk about suicide on those forums as much as you'd like, but it's directly against the rules to actually give methods to commit suicide. It's all the more against the rules when you push it further and start taunting people to commit suicide.

the pain wrote:Why is it if you mention suicide you get modded i dont get it. Its only natural, your born and eventually you die.

Yeah, all of us born and die. Many, many people talk here about suicide. Indeed I think everybody, with or without any illness or disorder think in any moment in their life about suicide. Death is a natural thing. Suicide is not a natural thing. It´s a last desperate moment or a last revenge- goodbye.

Wouldnt it be worse to watch someone suffer?

Right! In the same way, how do you think people who love you are gonna feel when you die. It´s an enormous pain.

There isnt a cure all for mental illness so what works for one person might not work for another.

AVDpd is not a mental illness is the result of a pile of maladaptative patterns of thoughts. Even, when there is not a complete cure. Tell me what person is completely sane? Nobody, at least with a certain age.
What about my suggestion of meeting each other for some support? Have you read the link posted by Butterfly. I read yesterday. Perhaps, you´ll find some help.

Please don't focus on the suicide issue. Steve234 responded just now and you all chose to ignore him. He was the one in need and the one who started the thread. Steve234, Im' very happy that you have come back to reply. How is everything going?

Kevin

twistermind wrote:

the pain wrote:

Wouldnt it be worse to watch someone suffer?

Right! In the same way, how do you think people who love you are gonna feel when you die. It´s an enormous pain.

I dont know how they would feel all i know for sure is the hurt and pain iv caused already. Not to mention all the time and money i have wasted fighting this uphill battle.

Saw this. I'm not so talkative now but thought I would warn Steve of the hospital. I knew a suicidal guy who went and they said you're fine and let him go. He did himself in. The docs at the hospitals are morons. They held me involuntarily for 2 years. Me being a threat to choild molesters. Really. Hookers wilol help you out more. really. I speak from expereince. The job thing. Yeah - that's tough. E-mail me. I will give you a fake reference so they will think you've been working somewhere. I had that problem when I had not been working for years. They looked at my application and sent me on my way. I finally lied on applications and got jobs. Then got my ass kicked out when they bothered to check. Fianally found a place that didn't check.

Chucky wrote:Please don't focus on the suicide issue. Steve234 responded just now and you all chose to ignore him. He was the one in need and the one who started the thread. Steve234, Im' very happy that you have come back to reply. How is everything going?

Kevin

Honey, how can we avoid talking about suicide when is one of the main points in Steve´s thread?
I don´t understand your words "you all chose to ignore him"???? I don´t understand, really.

the pain wrote:
I dont know how they would feel all i know for sure is the hurt and pain iv caused already. Not to mention all the time and money i have wasted fighting this uphill battle.

I also wasted many money in therapies and many, many time fighting againts my problems. I´m 37 years old and I have been suffering since I was 17 or less. I don´t know how I will be in the future but now I´m a bit better and I want to encourage you and Steve to go forward.
I want to tell you one more thing, my relatives have been suffering in the same grade than me or more. I try to put in my parents´shoes and see what would I feel if I had a child like me. But, I would feel worse if this child of mine decides to capitulate.