Do you think you'll die alone?

I think I'll die alone.
But that doesn't bother me. I always had a romantic idea of dying in a huge motorcycle accident.
I've never even ridden a motorbike

I'm worried about spending my life alone.
I'm sure I'll always have my friends, but they won't keep me warm at night.

I'm fast approaching 25, have only kissed 3 girls, and have had one non-serious relationship (seriously below par for a man of my age).
And I've got to be honest I was only in that because I was over joyed by the fact someone liked me enough to want to be with me. I knew I'd end up getting hurt, but it felt so good at the time. I'll never make that mistake again.

I would be willing to settle for someone.
Honestly it wouldn't matter if I didn't love them, just as long as they loved me.
Does that make me an a**hole, or just very lonely?

I don't think I'll ever even have that opportunity. In the last 18 months I've had one date. After speaking to this girl for 9 months online, via text, and on the phone we finally met each other.
After we met she stopped replying to my emails and texts. I guess she didn't like me

I think whether or not we live alone, and whether or not we are physically alone at the moment of death, dying is essentially a solitary event. We all die alone.

I know that you know, Uberfrau, many Buddhist practictioners devote much of their practice to preparing for the moment of death. To be fully present, awake, mindful, at the moment of death is believed to facilitate an advantageous rebirth.

Whether or not you believe in rebirth, it feels to me like a noble and potentially rewarding goal: to experience death as fully aware and accepting as possible. It would certainly help to reach that moment with as little regret or remorse as possible, too!

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I probably will. I get bored of doing the same thing for so long.

I'll probably at some point move out into the wilderness

I have a good job, but I'm bored of it already (sort of).

I'm holding out hope that I'll find a girl with low enough self esteem to stick around, let me marry her and pork her, then have my 2.5 kids

shhhshhh wrote:I'm holding out hope that I'll find a girl with low enough self esteem to stick around, let me marry her and pork her, then have my 2.5 kids

You've got to follow your dreams haven't you.

I think a Buddhist way of looking at it is, you're dying in each passing moment, as well as being born in every moment.

The point being that self, the sense of a continous self, is an illusion. There's only awareness observing each passing moment, but it can draw on memories of what was experienced in the past and weave a story around what's happened to it so far, and this gives the illusion of having a continuous sense of self.

So I suppose dying, if done mindfully, is just bare attention in a passing moment, just like every moment that went before it.

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Of course, that's the theory. Come my demise, I'll perhaps be sad I'm alone.

But maybe it's better. Very rarely in life, when things were very tough, have I been happy that someone was there. I tend to get myself through these things. I like to daydream about wonderful, perfect people coming into my life. But in reality I'm too easily upset or hurt and have a better time alone.

I think its my worst fear. I've been living with my bf for 2 years now and even though he seems to really care about me and wants to get married, I'm constantly thinking about leaving him. He's a really good person but sometimes I just don't feel connected to him. He doesn't interest me intectually, we don't laugh together or seem to have fun, and he doesn't challenge me to grow or better myself. Even worse sometimes, I'm afraid I'm only with him becuase he's the only 'real' friend I have right now and that I'm dependent on him and that he enables me to stay the way I am. I don't know if its my avpd acting up, but sometimes I afraid im settling with him and its just not enough. On the other hand he's put up with a lot and hasn't run away screaming and I'm 30 (*gulp*) and not exactly a big bowl of fun and I really don't know if there's anyone out there that I won't find something wrong with.