school.

so, i was supposed to start a new school today, with new people and so on. i was pretty psyched about it yesterday, feeling that i definitely could go through with this.

with only 10 minutes left to go i started feeling how the room got smaller, i watched the clock and just prayed for it to stop. my mom entered and said it was time for me to go, i just totally froze, i couldn't move. then i broke down in tears, i just couldn't go.

this has happened once before, so i skipped a year of school for just trying to feel better. now it happened again :/ i guess i'm so afraid of getting rejected that i just can't do it. right now i'm so disappointed in myself and i feel like i've let everyone down because i said to my parents that i would start school this year.

Hey, I'm glad you have posted this. I had problems of this nature too when starting new jobs in the recent past. It happened twice, in fact, but the third time I just did it (i.e. started the job). My parents encouraged me and made me feel like there was no other option.

On the two occasions that I backed-out, I broke down in tears on both occasions and, on one of them, I spent about 30 minutes on a high place contemplating jumping. My shock tactics won't work with you though. I'm merely just sharing my tale.

Is it too late to just join school a bit late? What harm exactly would it do? All you have to do is go there and do your own thing. you are not required to talk to anyone at all. Just go there and pretend it is just you, and the teacher teaching you.

I wish you well SuperStar. Please try your best; that's all you can do.

Kevin.

I'm sorry to hear about this. I always had trouble in the first two weeks of every semester. I also had major problems eating and sleeping in the two weeks before a semester. I just tried to keep a low profile and gutted it out. I had never heard of CBT therapy. You could look into that. I don't take medications, but you might cosider getting some ativan to use before situations that are going to cause major stress. It seems to work pretty well.