Misanthropy

I constantly find myself wanting to get away from all of society. Just sell all my things, buy a little house where there aren't any people for miles, and live out the rest of my life in peaceful solitude. It's just that I've grown sick of people's crap: Trying to be tough; trying to be cool; trying to be popular, all that stuff. Here are my grievances to both sexes:

I HATE how so many women will twist and alter the laws of logic based on their own feelings and desires. How they judge their husbands' love for them based on the size of a diamond. How they will act like old high school friends with another girl, then drag her name through the filth the instant she leaves the room. How they puff themselves up for hours about how they can do anything a man can do. But as soon as spider crawls up the wall or a jar lid just won't open, they morph back into the damsel in distress. How they think having a man "pussy-whipped" is an accomplishment to be bragged about at the mall with the girls. And how they will choose a man to be their life partner based on his wallet size.

I HATE how so many men live their lives for the purpose of jacking up their self-esteem. How they will put on any social facade if it will help them "get some pussy." How they think that they have the right to beat a woman senseless for a minor fault on her part, either real or imagined. How they need everything in their life to be ridiculously large (trucks, namely) because they want the world to make a connection between a big truck and big genitalia (as if that's significant.) How to them, inciting random violence to a stranger of less physical strength is a regular ritual to keep their arrogance fresh. How they choose their friends based on their "coolness." And how they will choose a woman to be their life partner based on her bra size.

Does anyone ever want to escape from all this?? Has anyone escaped already? If you did... I'd really like to know how.

Tough poll.

Would I get along with most people? Definitely not.

Do I dislike a lot of the ways people think and act? Definitely.

Do I dislike people in general? No way.

I don't believe anyone is at fault for who they are. It's unfortunate that they are this way, but I'm don't blame them. At the same time, I'd prefer to never interact with those I'm incompatible with (the vast majority).

You also need to realize that the average person is quite different than who they pretend to be. I suspect there are more people like you than you think

Trying to be tough; trying to be cool; trying to be popular, all that stuff. Here are my grievances to both sexes:

Hi AK1,
I for one think the that you should give up trying to be all those things. Look on it as a release, it will liberate you.

It is all an illusion anyway, feel pity or compassion for those who self esteem is based entirely on transparency and seek to find yourself. (If you think that's cobblers- there's more!)

Think of the things that are important to you, that's what i have been trying to do. I no longer try and be part of the crowd, to push down my own beliefs in order to fit. I never will 'fit' so, Hey thats cool too.

I for one would love to meet someone whose basis for intimacy was not entirely physical, I have been a 'trophy' and it is not good.

These people you speak of are pathetic in reality, immature and shimmeringly deluded; give only real, genuine and outrageously honest people the right to be in your life.


Oh, and as for moving to a secluded idyll, I want that too!

Care if I join you guys? I haven't given up on all people yet. What Ak1raK0nya wrote is true in regard to a lot of people, but there are good people around, their just a little bit harder to find.

oh yes

lol, i always find myself cheering for the villain who wants to destroy the world and end mankind for good^^.

I thought avoidants were "lonely loners," that they want to be with other people and long for personal relationships. If one doesn't like people in general, doesn't that mean you fall in some other category and not AVPD?

Avoidants often want idealized relationships, and fantasize about them. In the real world there might not be a single person that meets the impossible criteria. So, my theory is, that the deeper you get in to AvPD, the more you start to hate (or is it fear after all?) real people and love the imaginary ones.

I agree. If one avoids relationships, there must be a strong emotional basis to the reason for it but the very nature of AvPD suggests individuals will probably avoid really exploring the deeper reasons behind remaining alone. Hatred and fear of 'other people' is probably only a surface issue.

I'm no expert but it seems that AvPD'ers really are masters of projection.

Its interesting to me that forums like this that allow anonymity and lack responsibility of any kind create almost perfect environments for the projection of perfect personalities. (both perfectly good and perfectly bad)

No. 596 wrote:So, my theory is, that the deeper you get in to AvPD, the more you start to hate (or is it fear after all?) real people and love the imaginary ones.

To talk about something like AVPD, the definitions or defining criteria need to have meaning. "Fear" seems to fit the description of avoidancy, but not "hatred" or "dislike." If one dislikes other people, that would seem to fall in the category of antisocial (or maybe schizoid). Avoidants are not antisocial; they want to socialize. That's part of the definition. They avoid the social relationships due to fear. They reject others as a defense mechanism to control the situation and avoid the rejection they fear they would receive. Isn't that all part of the defining criteria?

Jonathon - I don't think I understand the end of your post. I know I project my thoughts/fears in my monitoring and evaluation of the conduct of others. I think I agree with your comment on avoidants being masters of projection, in that way. If your last point is meant that avoidants sense dislike in others because they are actually projecting the avoidant's own dislike for others, then I don't agree with that. Avoidants do not dislike others; they like people and long for intimate friendships. That's a characteristic of avoidancy. People who dislike others belong in another category.

Can you blame people for being stupid?

Maybe I'm just to nice, maybe to tolerant. I get really pissed at those zombies, but in the end I start doubting and feel sorry for their stupidity. I guess thats exactly the difference between us and them.

Become an asshole, become one of them.
We're to bloody nice towards people to love ourselves.