Told doctor I've got AvPD

Hi folks.

I know what some of you will say about this but I am self diagnosed and have some reservations about posting here because I'll probably get an argument about whether I'm really avoidant or be told to see a psychiatrist.

So anyway, a few months ago I finally mustered up the courage to tell my doctor that I think that I have a personality disorder and he asked me if it's borderline, possibly because in addition to having had problems with anxiety I've had some problems with drugs and alcohol. The drug problem was addiction to valium though, which I was prescribed for my anxiety and I suppose that he thought that I had BPD because I talked about being unhappy about not having a girlfriend and I did so because I had hit rock bottom at the time and needed help to stop drinking. That was some years ago and I dealt with those problems.

Now, here's the thing. I did see a shrink about the anxiety but I kind of lied when he asked me if I ever think about suicide. I have sometimes but it's just ideation and I don't self harm. I'm not saying yes to a question that could get me sectioned. My doctor doesn't actually want to send me back to the psychiatrists because he thinks that I'm just after a valium script.

Have you thought about ignoring that idea of a firm diagnosis? It might be easier for you to focus on trying out different therapy methods to help you cope better. The label might give you something to identify with, but finding a therapy style that works for you is what will improve your quality of life.

Yes. I don't think that I even want a diagnosis now, to tell you the truth. I don't really want medication and I have overcome some of my problems by talking to people, some of whom were councelors. Well, all sorts of people have qualifications in that these days and you can find yourself being offered therapy when all you asked for is guitar lessons. I did find meditation helped with my anxiety and although you're getting into philosophy and maybe Eastern religion there it's a personal thing really and a lot of the psychology of yoga makes sense because that's all about getting out of bad habits and thought paterns.

I love meditation! My psychologist recommended Tara Brach's guided meditation, and I have been doing daily meditation for a few months. Have you tried looking for a therapist who incorporates meditation as a therapy style?

It's more like I looked for people that did meditation or another spiritual practice and they also offered some sort of talking therapy. I've always had reservations about therapy, as such, because it's hard for me to see relationships as being genuine or meaningful, especially if it's with a professional like that. I have also had bad experiences with people that I trusted because they will tend to use things that you tell them about yourself against you. Saying that you have a drinking problem is a good example of that. If they then mistreat you and if you try to complain about that they will just say that you were drunk.

Are you in the UK? I thought not because you'd got Valium but then you've used the term "sectioned" and I don't think other countries say that.

Yes, I'm British. It's just that drug users call diazapam valium because that's what it is.

I meant that it's really difficult to get Valium on the NHS, they don't like giving it to people. I'd have thought they would give you an SSRI instead.

Your doctor can't diagnose you with a personality disorder anyway, only a psychiatrist can assess and diagnose those. I wouldn't be surprised if your doctor said borderline because it's the only PD he's ever heard of.

You won't get sectioned for saying you have suicidal thoughts.

Yeah, I know that they don't want to prescribe valium; which was what I said and I'm not on it. I was prescribed an antidepressant but I'm not on that anymore either.

My family has actually been trying to get me sectioned because I've gone no contact with them and they've been trying to say that I've got cannabis psychosis. My sister is a psychiatric nurse that works with children and I've told the police that I'm concerned about her children and those that she works with because she's like Nurse Ratchet from One flew over the coocoo's nest and she's covering up the fact that my mother (who she's letting look after her kids) is psychotic.

AvoidantPenny wrote:I meant that it's really difficult to get Valium on the NHS, they don't like giving it to people. I'd have thought they would give you an SSRI instead.

Your doctor can't diagnose you with a personality disorder anyway, only a psychiatrist can assess and diagnose those. I wouldn't be surprised if your doctor said borderline because it's the only PD he's ever heard of.

You won't get sectioned for saying you have suicidal thoughts.

Does valium actually help with pds?