A Controversial and Confused View on Autism.

Please help me understand this.
I'm not Autistic so I might be somehow wrong and I don't fully understand Autism since I don't have it but there are these two groups of people and they are both wrong.
One group says Autism is all bad.
The other group says Autism is all good.
They are both wrong!
Depending on where you are on the spectrum it could be more of a good thing for you or it could be more of a bad thing for you, it could even be equal for you.
So all these people saying "Autism is a good thing" is wrong, and all these people saying "Autism is a bad thing" is wrong.
Autism has it's pros and cons.
I'm honestly sick of the "all" mentality, I see it everywhere, but that is for another topic for another day.
There is no black and white, everything is grey, and until people see and believe that, where I will be happy and get along with people.
They don't call it "Autism Spectrum Disorder" for nothing.
And when it comes to the word "bad" I don't mean "evil" and or "morally wrong", just something that impacts your everyday life.
And I'm not saying Autism or even Asperger's is "abnormal", but doesn't it at least just a little bit mess with you socially and make you different for the wrong reasons?
And of course, it can make you different for the right reasons, like being talented.
This is where the "pros and cons" aspect comes into place.
If I'm wrong then tell me I'm wrong, and I'm sorry if I'm wrong.
I just don't get it when it's called a "Disorder" yet people treat it like it's not?
It just doesn't make any sense, you might as well just remove it from the DSM then and remove the "Disorder" at the end.
One person said online "Having autism is not a privilege neither a disability. It's just the 'new' normal."
I don't really agree on that, but, if someone can explain this to me then that would be great, maybe it will change my views and make me less confused about people's overly positive approach towards Autism.
And if people get offended then people please just approach my questions as mature as possible, I'm tired of offending people everywhere and I'm tired of being confused or being controversial and people get offended.
Thanks.

yes.

autism is a disability. it is also who we are. there are goods and bads. i might be happier if i was not autistic, but i am autistic and i like me and am happy to be me.

And I'm not saying Autism or even Asperger's is "abnormal", but doesn't it at least just a little bit mess with you socially and make you different for the wrong reasons?
And of course, it can make you different for the right reasons, like being talented.
This is where the "pros and cons" aspect comes into place.
If I'm wrong then tell me I'm wrong, and I'm sorry if I'm wrong.
I just don't get it when it's called a "Disorder" yet people treat it like it's not?

"wrong" and "right" are very heavy words. we socialize differently or not at all. if i want to be alone and not have any one around me so that i can think and be with myself, then it is not the way that other people want to do things. there's is not the only right. i am right, too.

talent is also heavy. saying i am talented because i am autistic makes it sound like i do not have to put work into it. i am a good writer because i have spent 15 years practicing. i don't write so well now because i have been out of practice and my head hurts, but i am a very talented and published writer. autism helps me sit down and type for a long time. autism keeps me locked in my head so i can think in words and only words. i type in my head. then, when i get to the keyboard, i just copy it onto the computer. but i still make the words. my talents are my talents. my autism lets me do them my way; my talents are not defined by my autism.

saying no to "Disorder" is part of the neurodiversity movement, which says that everyone has different ways of thinking and processing, but there are just different patterns of them. one pattern is autism. it just means that the brain way of being autistic isn't bad just like your brain way isn't bad. it is disabling to be autistic, though. i cannot do things that others can do. i will have much higher dependence on other people for things that i can do. so is it a disorder? it could be an order, just a different one, and one that is hard and disabled.

i think it is most important to remember that everyone is different. to many, the way that i talk about my autism is very negative. to others, it is very positive.

a lot of positivity comes from thinking about what could be possible if things were different. if i could wiggle and flap my hands and crush my head and chirp and moan and stare and rock and that would not mean that others try to stop me for being "rude", that would be good because then i could be inside myself more. i could have more people to be my friend because they would not think i was being mean. i could feel on the ground and feel more concentrated, even if it does not look like it. so, autism isn't bad. it's just others making my autism bad.

a lot of negativity comes from thinking about what now is like and what would be even in perfect states. if i wiggle or flap or stare or rock, no one hires me to a job where i could do very well because they think i cannot. i can be told i cannot help raise a baby. i can be told that i can't live there. i can be told that if i get help in school, it's not fair to other people.

and even if people stopped thinking i was bad or mean or incapable, i would still be disabled. sometimes i forget how to feed myself or remember to use the restroom. sometimes i cannot communicate myself to others because the words are not moving from my mind to my mouth and outside.

autism is so complex that you cant just compare two people with the same functioning label,with the same diagnostic label,with the same gender etc thats why-as OP stated,it is a spectrum.
and disability doesnt have to mean a bad thing,you can have a good quality of life with the right support, the right environment,the right aids/adaptions,the right finances and luck behind you,this is why autism is often labelled a disability under the social model of disability rather than medical model because autism wouldnt be as near as bad if the autistics environment and living was based upon their needs and not the neurotypical.

diagnosed ASD means you are impaired significantly in the triad of impairment,and it is a recognised disability whether its aspergers or kanners autism [or NOS],however you can choose to say you arent disabled by your disability,i just wish those people who hate ASD being associated with disability would stop insisting on claiming disability benefits as to do so means you must acknowledge disability,right? or is it just hypocrisy.

i am low functioning autistic with mild intellectual disability and i see myself as a proud neuro diverse adult,i couldnt care less about being labelled disabled or not,as long as its not someone making assumptions on my level of it,it is what it is,i dont let severity labels define my limits.

I guess you could say I'm not typical of autism. Despite symptoms as a child because I was born with thyroid not working everything was put down to that. I've been in special schools/units, mainstream schools and I've been to university and got an honours degree.

In psychological testing I've had the fastest record for completing the puzzles and scored above average in some things but for most (maths, social skills etc) my score was in the learning disability range.

The psychologist put (in her report) I had many self help skills, yet I also had many gaps in those skills!

I've memorised complex formula's but struggle to answer questions such as 'how do you feel?' Though I can learn what would the socially acceptable thing to say in a rote fashion.

Because dissociation was part of my 'coping strategy' I created persona's or 'alters' as they call them on here. They were my front or mask, the identity most (other people) saw and were whatever I needed them to be, to complete a task.

I have always had an intense sound phobia so when my meds were altered and I started losing hearing I actually found it useful as mine had been so intense and acute. The professionals gave me hearing aids to help, they helped but not in the way they intended as when my hearing returned I still left them in and turned off/blocked off or with dud batteries in. With the world at a more manageable volume I made great strides educationally. A phobia of public speaking could have prevented me getting a degree but in the days of equal opportunity you couldn't force deaf people to speak they had a right to a sign language interpreter, that was my way in! I got my degree.

It said in my psych report I only understood literal translations and not the social consequences and this showed true even at a much older age as it never occurred to me that people would feel cheated or lied to because THEY ASSUMED I was deaf just because I happened to wearing hearing aids and using an interpreter.

I'd never specifically said I was so profoundly deaf I couldn't speak (but couldn't speak in public due to selective mutism and I didn't know how to explain that) so therefore in my mind I hadn't lied. It wasn't my fault they'd assumed, and I couldn't control what others assumed or imagine their thoughts so therefore I'd done nothing wrong.

By the time I was older and discovered what Auditory Processing Disorder was, hearing aids were actually been started to be used to help the condition. I knew what I had and could explain it wsn't that I couldn't hear sounds but I struggled to work out what they were and seperate sounds from each other due to the processing issues. I still watch subtitles on the TV to help me work out what they are saying and what's happening.

I find people scary and unpredictable due to been the subject of bullying when young. I remember being was so shocked by someone's reaction of the thought I hadn't been deaf all those years I immediately back tracked as their face was frightening and their body language went unpredictable and scary and I thought I was going to get beaten up. I immediately tried to re-explain making them think they'd misunderstood me,they apologised and I never tried again. I decided it's safer to continue to let them believe what they want as despite being 'normal' they seemed unable to cope with any idea they might be wrong so it must be my fault!

I live a very isolated life now and see only my brother (parents died years ago) if I need him to help me do something I can't do myself. I trust no-one else except him,he understands my autism obviously growing up with me. People still scare me. I interact only when necessary to do something and then only as an alter and not as myself. That is 'my autism' and how it affects me.