Research: Social problems

Hello everyone,

I am trying to get to know more about autism and problems on the social area, but I can find very little on this subject. Would you mind answering some questions for me? It would help me a lot in understanding people with autism so I can assist them a bit better on my job!


What are the most prominent social problems you encounter regularly?

Is it easier to talk to strangers or to people you know for a long time? and why?

What do you think causes your social problems?

Do you trust people easily enough to talk freely?

If people talk to you, what is the hardest to understand? (like sarcasm, body language, intonation, or other things)

Can you easily convert your thoughts into words?


Thanks a lot for answering!

x
Claire

It's complicated but I'll give it a go...

"What are the most prominent social problems you encounter regularly?"

Lack of contact. The only people I see regularly are my parents whom I live with. The next closest are my brothers and their families every couple of months. Outside of first degree relatives the closest thing to a social contact are cashiers when I buy something.

"Is it easier to talk to strangers or to people you know for a long time? and why?"

Strangers. They don't have a reason to judge you unless you give them one. That said, the likelihood of talking to anyone for a long time is minimal since I'm effectively mute.

"What do you think causes your social problems?"

Judgmental people. Not fully taking into account or even understanding the consequences of what I say.

"Do you trust people easily enough to talk freely?"

No, but it hasn't always been that way. I've always been effectively mute though.

"If people talk to you, what is the hardest to understand? (like sarcasm, body language, intonation, or other things)"

Taking things literally... I've had many misunderstandings... I tend to read my own feelings into other people's body language so issues there too. I sometimes struggle with using intonation but think I understand it. ...and jokes. Oftentimes I'm both the one saying them and the last one to get them.

"Can you easily convert your thoughts into words?"

It depends on the thoughts... I'm very much a visual person and those thoughts I struggle with putting into words but concepts I'm fine with. It takes me longer than the average Joe though.

-Own thoughts, free form-

I need a structured environment to socialize. When I say I'm effectively mute I mean that I don't participate in small talk but if I believe it's expected of me I talk fine. I have a religious background and back when I was doing the church thing, the Bible studies I went to were ideal in getting me talking. Pretty much we all took turns talking about what a particular verse means. It's also what got me in trouble as what I thought it meant seems to have differed from what the leader thought it meant and I was essentially asked not to come back. :/ I've since lost my faith and have no clue how to socialize outside of that environment.

ManyHearts wrote:What are the most prominent social problems you encounter regularly?

That's a tough one. I guess I would say loneliness. I'm pretty good at talking to people in the short term, but not good at forming any kind of lasting friendship or whatever.

ManyHearts wrote:Is it easier to talk to strangers or to people you know for a long time? and why?

Don't have much trouble talking to people in general, but it's especially easy if it's someone I know and trust.

ManyHearts wrote:What do you think causes your social problems?

I think differently from most people, so they don't understand me and I don't understand them. Then, years of being socially isolated and rejected added even more issues.

ManyHearts wrote:Do you trust people easily enough to talk freely?

Yeah, in fact I tend to be too open. I'll tell complete strangers personal details about myself without thinking, and then think 'wait, was it a good idea to tell them that?' I don't feel embarrassed or anything, but I've had some bad reactions to my openness in the past.

ManyHearts wrote:If people talk to you, what is the hardest to understand? (like sarcasm, body language, intonation, or other things)

Anything involving sexuality. I'm asexual, so that adds to the incomprehensibility of sexually motivated behavior. So many times I've had someone flirt with me and I was completely oblivious until they either said something really obvious or someone else pointed it out.

ManyHearts wrote:Can you easily convert your thoughts into words?

Yes. In fact, most of my thoughts already are words to begin with.

What are the most prominent social problems you encounter regularly?

I don't feel comfortable with people and they are like strangers for me

Is it easier to talk to strangers or to people you know for a long time? and why?

I don't know/

What do you think causes your social problems?

I obviously haven't had a good childhood [no love or friends] and because of that I feel alienated to people. Also I am very childhoodish and weird.

Do you trust people easily enough to talk freely?

No

If people talk to you, what is the hardest to understand? (like sarcasm, body language, intonation, or other things)

People don't usually talk to me so I think sarcasm

Can you easily convert your thoughts into words?

No. Sometimes I don't even understand my thoughts.

What are the most prominent social problems you encounter regularly?

There are alot of them, but lets start somewhere.
When i don't know a person, i won't talk to him/her unless i really have to. Not sure why honestly, its either becouse it just feels like its too much work (more in the sense of the lack of motivation and/or too much work for my brain to handle) or its becouse i simply don't know what to say. Often people just say like "oh why don't you just start a converstaion?". Thing is that i can only wonder like how i would have to start a conversation. Whenever i would think about that i can only think as far as "hello" or something like that. I have no clue on what to talk about whatsoever and i'm honestly afraid of saying the wrong thing and either making the person angry or making myself look stupid. Meeting new people is by far the biggest issue for me, once i get to know a person i don't really have any big issues concerning social matters.

Is it easier to talk to strangers or to people you know for a long time? and why?

It depends on the person and the shared interests in my case.
Few years ago i met a person who was introduced to me by a friend, he and i inmediatly created a good friendship becouse we both shared very simular interests. On the other hand i have a nephew who i know my entire life, yet becouse we don't share any interests at all i have never been able to really talk to him and when we're together there is just a long lasting awkward silence.

What do you think causes your social problems?

Two things mainly i suppose.
When talking about meeting new people and such the main issue is that i don't know what to do/say. Basicly some sort of fear really.
The second thing is that i can't really talk about things that don't interest me. Usually i try but when there are no shared interests it quickly ends into silence.

Do you trust people easily enough to talk freely?

If me and the said person share common interests then yeah. Otherwise it can take ages for me to share anything about myself.

If people talk to you, what is the hardest to understand? (like sarcasm, body language, intonation, or other things)

Most likely body language.

Can you easily convert your thoughts into words?

During one on one conversations i can, but in groups i can't. Its probably pressure related as i need some time to find the right words.