Please anyone I need advice for my little girl.... ?

Im a parent of a 7 year old girl and I have been going out of my mind tring to find out what is wrong with her. She is very smart, funny and loves to watch tv, but she doesnt think (use her brain) before she does. She is constantly disrupting class and getting out of line. She is always in trouble in school.

Her grades are surprisingly good. She is an excellent reader and loves it. We went to a psycologist to find out what was going on with her behavior and he said it was adhd after just one session. He gave us some ritalin. We tried the ritalin and it didnt seem to help at all. We decided to stop giving it to her after 2 months because I was not going to continue giving her that drug or any drugs that didn't do anything for her.

Some of here behaviors consist of :

1 Acting before thinking (impulse)
2 she seems to not sleep to well at night
3 seems like she is acting a role when she is in trouble instead of seeming genuinly upset about being in trouble. Before discipline happens she is happy go lucky after discipline happens she acts as if nothing happened and she didnt learn a thing from any of it.
4 push and bossy with peers and a lot of them dont want to be around her because she is annoying

My wife is fed up and almost doesnt want anything to do with her anymore. (stepmom) I almost can stand her myself and I wish i didnt have any feeling like that to my own daughter. Please can anyone tell me if it really sounds like ADD or ADHD. I reallly need the advice. Could it be something else, or just maybe behavior problems that need the appropriate plan to work? Please anyone who knows anything...... help.

I would be leary of someone diagnosing my daughter (who is 6 1/2 and can often act like your daughter) in just one session. I was tested for ADHD and it took a lot longer then just a short session. I had been counseling w/ my dr. for months and then when it was considered...I did a series of testing w/ my counselor and that was combined w/ his meetings w/ me before he made his decision I was dealing w/ something else entirely.

It could be that your daughter is simply bored and needs more challenge. TV can be a big disadvantage for a child that is very smart and needs stimulation. TV doesn't do that. Now I'm a big tv lover myself...but I have to really keep it to a min. in my home. I can tell when my girls are really getting restless. w/ my oldest...she needs to get one-on-one attention. And often times she just flat out needs to be alone. But her activities...in her case....need to be active...not just sitting type activities. When she's bored and not challenged...she'll act out more. When she's allowed to be very creative...or simply have our full attention...she is your perfectly normal 6 yr. old!
Has your child been tested in school? Is it possible she is above skill for her grade level? So often kids that are very smart...and doesn't have to be like major high iQ either...but some children ...it's not that they have ADHD...but their needs and environment...well if it's not met for them...they can show signs that are much like symptoms of ADD and ADHD....maybe she just needs more attention and challenge in her routine. It's worth looking into what she really needs to fulfill her before rushing to judgement on something like ADD and ADHD and getting her on meds she may not necessarily need. Try to really assess her needs and make some changes in her routines, etc. and see how that works for a while. And I mean you can't just try a few things for 3-4 days and then say...well that didn't work. Give it a good month and take notes...watch her....make small changes to your game plan if need be but otherwise stay consistent and see if you notice changes. If you pick up on something that works...stick w/ it...if you think something might not be working so well....tweek that. Then if after you give it a really good run....you still feel it's not helping....then go back to a psycologist and have her tested further.

Just my thoughts. I don't disagree w/ ADD and ADHD...but it is so often OVER/MIS diagnosed in children!

Well, I took her off meds cause i do not like them in the first place. We do try to challenge her constantly and have kept her free from tv for over a year now. Occasionally we will all sit and watch movies together but that is the just of it.

My daughter has a hard time with challenges. She gives up really easy, asks tons of questions, and does things terribly wrong. We ask her to do something simple like a chore (we all have a few chores to do during the week). If she is told how to do something she will do it half way and think its good enough. She also gives up if she cant figure it out and stops trying. We use simple instructions that a 3 year old could understand. she still asks questions and gets it wrong even after we answered. We are not critical with what we ask, we just want her to do it the right way the first time instead of her going back and forth over and over again.

We are totaly lost with what to do. for the last two years we have tried everything in the books to try and get her to learn some responsiblity, stay calm and not so hyper, and maintain composure in class like the rest of the kids. She is the worst one in her class. Im worried about her and when she gets into the 3rd grade. Im afraid other kids are less tolerant to distracting and annoying peers. Im afraid for her social life because she does not have good social skills. She has lost many friends because of her actions yet she does not learn from these mistakes and they get worse.

Im still at a loss. I will try to challenger her and up the 20 minute sessions we already do. Everyday I do a play session with her and we pretend together and play most of the time its 20 minutes long.

I Have a child who is 8 at the age of 4 they diagnoses her with adhd combined type, here four years later and after extensive testing we come to find out she is not adhd but Aspergers, they were treating her for adhd including behavioral management and could not figure out why it wasnt working, it is because she was mis diagnosed now that we have the right diagnosis, things are going so much better. Like you when they first diagnosed her with adhd it was a very short visit. So please look further into it before allowing them to treat your child with meds and such. Ask for a comprehensive psyc eval.

My almost five year old was diagnosed with adhd last week. We do not want meds and the dr said to wait till she enters kindergareden adn see how she acts first. However she has a very structered speech therapy seession and we can already see how she reacts in the situation. We are lost. You were saying that your daughter was diagnosed early and found it was a whole nother diagnoses later. My question is how did the two disorders differ?

sounds like a typical case of ADHD

check out this url for more advice

http://www.whatafeeling.net/adhd.php

My best suggestion is that you take your daughter for further, more indepth evaulation w/ a psychiatrist...work w/ a counselor and go for more then just a 30min. to 1hr. appt.!!! ADHD and ADD are often misdiagnosed and easily so.....the symptoms are often misleading....what i mean is ...well....look at how structured school is now...preschool and kindergarten. I am just amazed at the idea that in kindergarten this year my daughter has only ONE recess....I can't get over how much of my 6yr. old's day is structured....lots of desk type work....my mother commented on Grandparent's day how surprising it was to see what is expected of the kids so young now....my daughter's teacher, for example, stood at the front of the class and gave the kids a long list of tasks to complete relating to one assighment....she explained....gave the list...and sent them back to their desks. They were expected to complete everything then on their own....not like she said...ok kids...first lets do this...then they'd complete it and she'd move on to step 2. And what surprised my parents more in watching was how well the kids did w/ this. I mean...the expectations are so much greater then they were when I was in kindergarten!! (25yrs. ago....think how different it is from even 5 or 10yrs. ago!!!!) There is less and less creative playtime. My daughter this year is learning to write, spell, read. That's stuff that when I was little was started more in 1st/2nd grade. Kids have not changed all that much....but expectations as to what should be happening at certain ages very much has. We expect more and more out of a 5yr. old...or 3yr. old in preschool. They are expected to sit for long periods of time now...they are expected to learn some pretty complex things for kids that young of age. And most handle it very well. But other kids....I am not quick to agree that if they can't handle this and become restless and hard to handle in class that oh well gee...it must be ADHD or ADD. I think it's very normal to have a child become very restless in a classroom setting that is overly structured at that age. Look at the numbers of children diagnosed w/ ADD and ADHD nowadays. I'm not saying that anyone having posted on this thread does not have a child who sincerely has this. I can't possibly know that from reading a post! But I think if your child is suspected of having any such disorder....it bears being checked out in depth....by more then just one visit to a dr. Drs. can be wrong!
Also bear in mind....many people know of some classic symptoms of ADD....it's not too hard to apply them to children that don't sit still...have polite manners....act how we wish a child should but maybe is not exactly realisitc. So off to the drs. we go w/ our children....we say....dr. I'm here today because I'm worried my child has ADD....we start to list their behaviors based on the check-list of symptoms we read. The dr. nods his head in agreement and prescribes meds. WHAT IS WRONG W/ THIS PICTURE?!!! I've been told by my counselors that this is supposed to be a complex thing to diagnose...how can you get a true picture of a child's history and problems in a 30min. appt???? I don't feel you can.

I'm not knocking anyone here who is concerned their child is dealing w/ this. I applaud you for trying to research your concerns and get answers. And again I stress that I obviously can't know from reading one post if someone's child is truly dealing w/ ADD or not. I just really push caution when having your child evaluated. Don't be afraid to ask questions when you are unsure of what the dr. is telling you. Provide as much history and information on your child as you possibly can. And rather then starting w/ your family medical dr. who is really not as trained in this area.....start by seeing a family counselor or psychiatrist who has more experience in properly diagnosing something of this nature.

AS for the ritalin. Meds for ADD and ADHD have come a LONG way since ritalin. I'm surprised when I hear it's still prescribed! Not saying it's bad .....but there are many other options now that are worth researching w/ your dr. as well as on your own and then discussing w/ your dr.!!!

My best to all of you in this situation. Sounds like you are all starting out on the right track....asking questions and looking for 2nd opinions before forging ahead and feeling unsure!

As a psychologist-I have diagnosed many children with ADHD. ADHD has three main symptoms-hyperactivity, inattention, and impulsivity. All three symptoms do no need to be present to have AHDH; however, the displayed symptoms must be present in more than one setting for at least six months. Therefore, if she is not displaying the symptoms at home but in school-chances it is not ADHD.

Now for additional information:

Many other issues (not necessary disorders) can mimic ADHD.

1) You stated that your daughter does well in school and has good grades. Gifted and Talented children often display acting out behaviors in the classroom because they are bored. You may wish to ask the school to evaluate your daughter for a gifted and talented program.

2). There may be some underlying issues in the classroom or playground that are upsetting her at school. Sometimes when children are victims of bullying by other students-they act out in the classroom because they have not yet developed adequate coping and communication skills at her age.

3) Sensory issues such as a hyposensitivity of sounds, colors, orders, etc...can mimic the symptoms of ADHD. The person who evaluates these is an Occupational Therapy with a certification in Sensory Integration Therapy.

3). occasionally medical conditions can exhibit symptoms that you have described in your daughter. Examples of some medical conditions that your Ped may want to rule out include allergies (including food), sleep disturbances, thyroid conditions, and other medications.

Lastly, there is still little research on ADHD in girls and how medications react within their system. ADHD medications are started at the lowest dosage and then increased over time. In addition, some medications work for some children better than others do. It is an individualized process. Parents working with their child's doctor may want to start a trial of a different medication if the first one is not effective.

I would like to add-that behavioral interventions are an important part of the process in working with an ADHD child. The company that makes concerta has an excellent parent/home system that helps developed behavior goals with rewards that is free (no postage) and excellent. I believe the link is at www.concerta.com

Hope this helps

Under sensory issues-I meant a hypersensitivity not hypo. Opps and sorry for any misunderstandings.

My daughter is 11 now. She was diagnosed (After just one session) at the age of 7 with ADHD...She has the VERY same sypmtoms as your daughter..Plus sooo many more that are even worse then the ones listed. But she has failed every subject for the last two school years and still has passed on to the next grade. Her school..Teachers and social workers and very poor in giving me the help I so desparately need..She sees a phycotherapist for the past 6 months but still not getting any better. She has been on aderall..Concerta but only made her worse...So we stopped giving them to her.

My husband and I are also..Unfortunately..To the point where you don't want to be around her. And I get so sad and very frustrated that I can't DOO anything to help her. And the more I try to help her and show that I'm helping her...The more she fights me and pushes me away. I have no idea how to raise and care for her anymore...And it's so sad and hurtful

So I can VERY much relate...Good luck to us all...