Anger?

My son who is 14 was diagnosed with ADHD when he was 8. Lately he has been very angry. Every since he was little if you yell at him or even talk in a firm voice he lashes out and starts to yell and curse at you. Everyone is the house has gotten used to talking calmy and quietly around him but he other day his step mother told him to do something and he said your not my mother. She raised her voice and he cursed at her and slammed his door and wouldnt stop yelling . Im wondering if this is because of the ADHD?? Thanks for your help

Oppositional Defiant Disorder is a common comorbid with ADHD, and ADHD does cause anger management issues on it's own, so yes.

I'm sure his hormones aren't helping the situation either.

It may help if when you ask him to do something, you offer him a reward instantly. Most individuals with ADHD will not respond to future-rewards. There is no point offering to give him something "after" his room is cleaned for example. Also negative enforcement (telling him off, trying to make him feel back, being critical) will only reinforce his anger and oppositional behaviour.

Sounds like me from the time I was 12-18. Luckily, I grew out of it. I did the same types of things, I would kick my bedroom door until there was a hole. I was diagnosed with ADHD at 6 and lated ODD. I haven't taken any type of medication for ADHD in 5 years and no longer have any ODD or any other diagnosis. I think some kids just display anger in different ways. Maybe something else is going on at school? Have you tried anger management? Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I personally thought it was a joke. The one thing that made my anger go away was having a child of my own and getting out of my parent's home. So yes, I think ADHD could have something to do with it due to impulsivity and things like that. But telling him he has adhd will not help. I remember being so pisseed that my mom always brought up the fact that I had ADHD, and I needed to take my medicine or I would be grounded, or my adhd made me impulsive, or my adhd made me angy...it felt like constant ridicule and made me hate being within 5 feet of her. She still brings this up today and I just laugh considering I have found ways to over come my anger. It is not something I want my 2 yr old to see. Maybe he will grow out of it. The best thing you can do is try to just leave him alone if he is angry. It only makes the situation worse when you hear constant nagging about getting something done. If he says he will get it done, let him do whatever it is he says he will do and give him a time to have it done by. Be realistic. If you want him to clean his room and it is 9am, tell him he has until 10pm to get it done. If he wants to go do something with friends, let him. But let him know 10pm still stands and it will be done by 10 no matter what or there will be consequences and leave it at that. As being in his situation before...again nagging and things of that sort only make the anger worse and the situation worse. Do not repeat things over and over.
Good luck.

Oh and to be quite honest with you..the worst is hearing someone talk rational to you when you know you are being completely irrational. If you are talking calmly and he is yelling and carrying on, chances are he probably feels stupid. Sometimes he might just need to yell. If all he is doing is yelling and cussing in his room, it is not that bad. It could be much much much worse for a child with ODD. I suggest just carefully picking your battles with him. Don't talk down to him, talk to him like an equal. Be understanding of what he is upset about, show empathy. And one thing I learned in my one of my social work classes (which is my major) - don't ever put the disease before the person. He is a child who has ADHD. Not an ADHD kid. Try to refrain from putting the disease before the person because it makes the person feel as though they are first and foremost carrying a problem, and only secondly a person. This also gives them a "free ride" to act in the behaviors that are categorized with the mental illness or whatever. Problems with labeling are worse when you call someone a schizophrenic, sociopath, etc. That's more of the disease before the person than a person with ADHD. But, I mean since i've been there, just try to not talk about the diagnosis. It really makes you feel like less of a person.