Damned Asperger's!

Hello, I'm another sad case with Asperger's Syndrome. Although I'm 22 years old, I've discovered about this syndrome only few days ago, when I read a biography of Glenn Gould who apparently had it too.

As I read various descriptions of the disorder, I felt like I was reading my own story. Only one positive thing in my case is that I don't have such problems with studying - I attend a university quite without problems (except for the social isolation and weak communication skills).

I've never had true friends and I don't even want them. I'm just dreaming of having a girl friend, at least only one kiss would make my life happier. But it isn't possible to have one, thanks to the nice syndrome which is there with me since my childhood. Sometimes I feel really depressed - about my strange individuality, about my future career and many other things, mostly related to the future.

But there is one possible sign of hope. I started to eat the right food and to practice yoga (alone, naurally) and although it may last a long time before the effects appear, it seems I'm not so upset with other people and my muscles are not as tense as they used to be. And this is my recommendation to other sufferers:
1) try to eat as healthy as possible, especially legumes (my favourites are red lentils), fish (mackerel, salmon etc.), lots of fruit and vegetables (especially broccoli, carrot, pears). You will feel better and also look better.
2) start practising yoga, or similar exercises. It doesn't matter when you start.
3) try to relax and if you feel bad in a social environment, focus on your slow, deep and calm breathing.

This syndrome is really annoying, but I hope something can be done about it. I would appreciate if you have some tips to (at least) reduce the symptoms of the disorder.

(Please be patient with my English, it isn't my native language)

Hopefully finding out you are Aspergers will be a help to you as you read more about it and talk to others who are Aspergers (try the Aspergia forum). Many Aspergers improve their skills as they get older. There's some thought that we develop more slowly, including physically. You can also consider your strengths. There are some things we don't do as well as others but there are some things that we do better. I am married to a non-Aspergers and we both help each other in areas the other is better at.

We are good at logic, learning alot about a subject, many of us have special skills, honesty, loyalty, a strong sense of justice, an ability to see things others can't see such as the intentions of a person or organization. You'll have to find other strengths you possess.

The social skills aspect is difficult but can be improved upon. Most non-Aspergers will not understand our difficulties and place a moral judgement upon us, assuming we don't care or are doing negative things on purpose (although some Aspergers do get frustrated and give up). The caring and trying is part of what creates our anxiety so I think recognizing that you won't be able to please everyone (which no non-Aspergers can do either, anyway) and accepting that you just can't navigate the complex social world perfectly well will go a long way towards feeling better.

Some of us do quite well job/careerwise and others not so well. It sounds like you are in school, now that you know you are Aspergers you can pick a field that will suit your skills and minimize your weaknesses.

The eating right and excercising definitely makes a difference for me, as well.

I too have recently discovered this syndrome, after a friend was professionaly diagnosed. I have found it difficult but niot impossible to socially interact - close friends are hard to come by, but can last a lifetime. You should make an effort to be more inclusive in social situations. Start small - a local yoga class would be a good start, as are most special intrest clubs or groups where our depth of knowledge and focus come to the fore, and are welcomed. These clubs are mostly social, as they consist of amatuers who desire no professional standing. A more professional association might suit you better, but the intent is to expand your social skills, not isolate yourself in an ivory tower. Painful as most social encounters are, you will be amazed at the pleasures they can provide. This happens rarely for me, yet I throw myself into the pit of humanity again and again to fine one of these rare gems. You will not relate to everyone, but those few who you do relate with are usually exceptional individuals, with our advanced thought processes plus the social skills.

Don't be discouaged by a slow start to your social life - just be willing to work at it. It takes effort, but the rewards are irreplacable.