A career seems unattainable.

Maybe it's the depression that's clouding my mind, but I have been feeling extremely hopeless for a while now. I don't know how I'm going to get through college. I can't write 10, 15 pages worth of essays every week. It takes me a week just to write a 5 paragraph essay, and that's only high school. I also don't know how I'm supposed to get a job with this deathly fear of interviews. I do this all the time. I picture myself, 10 years from now, trying to get a job as an accountant or something, and the interview goes "So, tell me about a project you worked on where you had a leadership role" and I completely blank out. I am completely horrible at talking about myself, mostly because I know very little about myself in the first place. I am also extremely unmotivated. Doing anything, anything at all, even something as simple as brushing my teeth, having to warm up my car, read a book, all of these things just wear me out. I also have social anxiety disorder, which doesn't help anything.

Sometimes I wish I could just file for disability and never have to work. I would be happy living a dull life in a boring apartment as long as I don't have to work. It's a very apathetic point of view, but it is one that I shall keep until something changes for me.

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Oh yeah, anyone else extremely afraid for their future?

Disability is good for a little bit and it can take the edge off, but all to soon you realize you have to do something else. The only apartments I can afford are income dependent (rent is 25-30% of any income I have), and they're owned by organizations that help people learn how to take care of themselves in spite of mental illness. Apparently these people want to live on their own but can't cook or clean, and can't shop properly in a grocery store. So, part of the requirement for living there is spending most of each day learning how to cook and clean, and being taught to only get what I need while at the grocery store. Also, I must actively be looking for work, holding a job, or volunteering to stay there.
Given how long the educational groups last, I'm shocked they expect me to be able to adequately hold down a job unless I'm working 2nd or 3rd shift, or just one part time job that gives me 3 hours in any given day.
At first, I was ok with just being on $749 a month, but that didn't last too long. Now I want to be able to pay required expenses, and be able to see a movie or go on a date every now and again. Part of why I ran into a problem is I had been working a job where I earned about $2k a month, but my problems with people ended up causing me to quit. Lawn care is a pretty good job, but it's seasonal unless you're living somewhere like Florida, and if you work with crackheads that makes it pretty tough to stay.
I want to get a job, but I've quit so many after such a short amount of time that no one who looks at an application of mine takes it seriously. I even follow up and still don't get any call-backs. This is, unfortunately, on jobs I know I can do. The only places where I know I'd probably get hired are places offering jobs I know I can't do. Unless I want to jump from job to job every 2-3 months, that is. Sometimes less than a week goes by. My best bet is to finish my degree, as is yours. I've found I work best while taking 2 courses a semester, so it'll definitely take me longer, but I end up on the dean's list each time. Are there any requirements as to course load that keep you from taking fewer credits?

I know this hopelesness, but it worked out for me.

I have managed one that while not extrememly lucrative, hasn't driven me crazy or made me miserable for over 20 years. Search for all my posts and read the ones that pertain to employment, college, etc. I have found a way.

I totally understand the sentiment... All I can say is just take things one day at a time and see where that leads you...

I work in a career in which it would seem that I would be totally unsuited for --nursing,but I have been able to make it work despite weak social skills.I am one of the best workers in dealing with problematic residents despite saying very little to them.I have the ability to assess the situation [God given -Asperger characteristic???] and to know what is the best approach to take.I say very little but what I do say is effective.

I decided early on that my career would be to do as little as possible to earn as much as possible for the shortest time possible so i could be a lazy sod for the rest of my life.

I consider myself very successful in my career.

ya, this is a tough situations for me too. I hate interviews. I dont understand how my ability to lie about myself helps me do a job. We have plenty of evidence to show "selling" yourself doesnt make you a good employee(corruption).

Then my area of interest for a career requires alot of hours at god awful hours(hoping to end up in anaethetic nursing by the end). I guess this is what i get for finding it interesting.

Hi, you described your self but you may as well have described me. I have a crippling panic come over me in interviews, i have found this doesnt go down well with employers.
I currently have a job where i am still on the first 3 monthes probation, before this I spent 9 months on job seekers allowance after finishing a temporary work placement scheme (only one who turned up for the interview and apparently they were desperate ). during this 9 months i volunteered at the council ( not to hard in my area to get volunteering jobs) in the environment sector, this took up 4 days a week and i was given a few benefits (lunch money, bus ticket etc). I have also done a 3 month stint as a coastal warden being paid nothing living in a draughty house with no electic. the jobs being a volunteer ones ment theat i could take it at my own pace and that when i found a job that i really wanted i didnt have large gaps in my cv. My current job i suspect i got by being the only one to turn up for the interview, it was my worst interview yet, in my panic i told them that I dont really know microsoft office that well, never used sage, that they will find i dont have a personality (far to quiet in social situations to be noticed (just the way i like it)), and that because im quiet i wont cause anyone to hate me. bit long but what im trying to say is take it slow and try to find something you like, it may not be something you can build a career on but with good planning of finances you will be able to make it work even if your not driving the fanciest car, live in a huge new build house, and go on holiday every year, what matters is being happy in what ever job you find yourself in even if its minimum wage. (im guessing you dont live in england but check what benefits/tax credits you may be entitled to on a low income, it will open up a whole new set of jobs. as to interview questions wait till you get "what colour are you?", these questions I dont believe can be answered by an aspie who hasnt researched the correct answer (go for yellow - bright sunny personality gets on well with others).
and finally as to the future terrified but that is what keeps me going, trying to get the stability that can be hard for aspies.

I see where you're coming from. I can get jobs easily. As a "pretty" tall, blonde girl with slightly too big boobs for her body I get jobs as a waitress without even saying sth at an interview. I get jobs as a hostess, barmaid, model, waitress without any efford. I just have to stand there and they hire me. So I do that. And I absolutely hate it. Every second of it. I am actually at a point where I enjoy my waitress/barmaid job because my co-workers are nice (some of them) but as soon as it comes to serving people... awful.

I really want a nice job at my university, sit in an office and work with numbers and papers. But I don't get a job like that because I f*ck up the interview. I'm actually qualified for the jobs! Way more qualified than for the night-time jobs. But I need money every month, I can't just quit after a few weeks like I used to... It's depressing.

Get your gen eds (basic courses) over with, and things will start to get better. Yes, you will have to write lots and lots of papers, give speeches/presentations, and be put into awkward situations, but by that time you'll only have classes that YOU want, so things will actually be relatively enjoyable, and you'll have your previous experiences to help.

I'm a sophomore in college at the moment, and I wanted to quit college my first semester. I hated walking around campus, as the social interaction made my blood pressure/anxiety skyrocket and it was like torture. The exams were also pretty tough. Best thing to do is to force yourself to stay there and make the most of it. You can't do a thing without a college degree in today's world.