My 15 year old is very dismissive and disrespectful when my wife or I ask him to tell us how his day went and what he did at school. We want him to talk about successes or struggles and share with us. We ask him at the dinner table and in private in his room. He is not forthcoming and says nothing is wrong. We know things are wrong.
He doesn't want to confide in us or tell us issues. He tends to keep it all in and seems morose and pensive at home. He is an athlete on the basketball team and football team, probably the best athlete, best shooting percentage, best rebounder, but tends to lose playing time because he doesn't communicate with coaches or players on team and has issues with quick recall and processing time on the plays called by the coach.
It has really hurt his morale and confidence. This has been an ongoing and frustrating issue with him over the last 4 years. He tends to freeze and not play loose. Football is better than basketball. The basketball coach sees him as lazy an lethargic because he doesn't acknowledge or have high sense of urgency or quick movemments or talk on the court.
He has become more moody lately, and morose lately and doesn't want to share his frustrations or dsicuss anything or be touched with a hug. He doesn't want to share how he is feeling or why he seems depressed.
We have also taken away his SnapChat and Instagram over the last 3 months because it seemed to be a source for "vaping" discussions, jules, inappopriate conversations with girls occasionally and hyper amount of social interaction with "streaks" and communication that did not seem positive. He was also lying about buying vaping products, using, bought some pot, drank some beer, distributing vaping products to be "cool" and got his younger brother suspended from school.
Now, he seems to feel "left out" and excluded from things because he does not have SnapChat and IG, but we feel he is not mature enough to handle the information overload or content. But, have we possibly made it worse ?
Plus, he is very quiet and introverted even though a great athlete, and has a 3.5 GPA as a Freshman. He recently got diagnosed by Speech Pathologist with communication disability. So, we know he has issues speaking to others at school and having normal conversations. He says he never feels any emotion about anything, but it is probably hypersensitivity and he shuts down. He doesn't want hugs or discuss emotions.
It is just a very frustrating time for us and we just want him to talk to us and get it out. He seems to just keep it all in and never wants to talk about anything. We just want to help him, but we feel so helpless.