Growing out of AS?

Many sources say you cannot grow out of AS, but I believe I disagree. When I was 8, I was diagnosed with AS in a clinic in Nottingham. I am now 26. When I was younger, I could not make eye contact and I did not understand others' facial expressions etc. but now I have no problems at all in this respect - it all comes naturally to me now. Can anyone tell me why people say you can't grow out of it, as it seems I have done? I have virtually no problems with social interaction now, although at school I did have some difficulties in the earlier years.

Edit: I just did the AQ test and scored 13. I think this probably means I have grown out of it...?

Cheers,

Matt

Hey,

I have heard the contrary to that: The sources that I have read say that many Aspies DO eventually "grow-out of"' Asperger's. This is why they say it is very hard to diagnose the syndrome in adulthood (Because by that stage most of the normal symptoms of ASperger's have been masked).


Think of it thus: It just takes us more years to get used to the things that neurotypicals take for granted. We have to learn things - social etiquette doesn't come naturally to us.


Kevin.

Well, I'm 63 and I'm still struggling. I'm just now emerging from another crisis brought on by my Asperger's mentality. Certainly every individual is different including the degree of severity of the AS.

I struggle get through each crisis, despite my life-long effort "to grow out of it," I secret the condition as best I can, but of course I fail to hide it from whomever is involved with me while I'm having my difficulties.

Mostly, I have been successful in hiding my AS. I was not diagnosed until age 62. I have mentioned my diagnosis on two occasions to teachers in Special Education. Their reactions were remarkably similar.

"What?" they said. "You come with me into my classroom. I'll show you Asperger's. I think you need to go back to that shrink and get your money back. You don't have Asperger's."

Well, perhaps they would react differently if they had to live inside my head. The results have been depression and solitary self-destructive behavior (ie alcohol). Sometimes I have to gag to get the booze down, but if I can, I know at least some of the pain will go away. I can't stand the pain--it feels like a knife cutting through me.

So yes, some are obviously more successful living with AS than others.

Hey,

I'm just 23 (24 next Tuesday). I've been wanting to talk to someone older with Asperger's bevcause I'm very worried about my future. Could you give a broad overview of how life has been? I'm really interested to know because - as I said - I'm very worried about my future.


I've already dismissed alcohol as a way out. I haven't had a drop for about 3 years now. Admittedly, I did drink to excess.


Thanks.
Kevin

I don't want to bore you all with the ins and outs of my story but basically i'm 24 now, and for what was arguably a whole number of reasons i got what i believe to be asperger's when i was about 17. I don't in fact know if what i've got is asperger's and it's taken me seven years to even figure out what it could possibly be. Nobody has ever EVER talked to me about my condition or even tried, and when i do try everyone shrugs it off and changes the subject of conversation (you're fine, don't worry about it...). I've think i've got so many asperger's traits to their extremity and so many more i do not have at all.

The basic thing that sprung to mind whilst reading this post is that before i was 17 i didn't have a hint of the traits that gradually have come to take hold of me... I don't know if this is abnormal for people with asperger's, or whether people say you generally have it from birth. The fact that i did not have any apparent symptoms until i was 17 makes me one hundered percent determined to re-learn all that i have lost/unlearn all that i've learnt. I cannot/do not believe it to be at all possible for me personally not to be able to 'cure' myself someday.

From what i can gather, asperger's syndrome is something that needs to be greatly refined in a medical sense if this is possible as there are so many different cases and different things that effect different individuals (i'm guessing). Not that that matters much as i have never really wanted to be diagnosed as a label is not going to help me one way or another! I believe there is a 'cure' in the sense of self-overcoming. Perhaps for people who were younger when they had more pronounced symptoms than i had in my infancy it will be harder for them to 'cure' themselves from?

This may also make no sense whatsoever of course, it's just my perspective, and i've never met anyone else with asperger's in my life!

Did anything happen at 17 that triggered the onset of the symptoms of Asperger's?

iv had pretty much the same behavior sense i was 2 years old. My mother knows. But like a good mom... wont entertain it.

Basically, the main cause i could argue would be the incessant hash smoking that i'd been doing from around 15. Nobody believes this to be the reason when i tell them of course because all my friends didn't get affected by it in that way... The hash kept on gnawing away at my emotions, killing them, beating my mind up but i kept going with it... peer pressure... I used to drive myself insane believing things would happen for no real reason... Still, i kept on going and then all of a sudden my eyes became... dead. and my eye contact became non-existent and has been up until now. I kept on smoking still regardless for about 2 years, had an epileptic fit (i'd never had one till then), then gave up the hash for the booze. I thought once i gave the hash up everything would go back to normal, and the booze kept me social but my body has been utterly ravaged... I don't need pity i hate that it's the last thing i want... it's just how it is and every day's a social struggle,...

I stopped drinking about 2 years ago and slowly, SLOWLY i like to hope to think i know things are improving... But it's just the eyes, i'm perpetually stuck on the eyes and all that they supposedly embody... I can't say it's all bad as my creativity as a recluse has musically blossomed and i've managed to form a potentially mind blowing band (But everyone in a band says that!). Also i understand sarcasm to a T, and i am not obsessed with train times or anything like that! My obsessions are more abstract, but then absolutely everyone on this planet has an obsession don't they? But i do absolutely loathe small talk! And come across as rude and disinterested... misunderstood?

So basically the trigger to my condition was the hash, but then i could also say it was a trigger of birth because i died for about seven minutes just as i was being born. Psychologically it's hard to tell how this has effected me, but i'm sure it has in some ways as i've always been tortured by the scenario of suddenly stopping breathing for no reason at all... And lack of oxygen to the brain when for any time at all can't be too good for a baby i guess... And i've always been a dreamer... Life is so utterly complex and impossible to even try and grasp though so to generalise about anything to anyone about what's good and bad and what condition is why can be a highly decieving thing!

Chucky wrote:Hey,

I'm just 23 (24 next Tuesday). I've been wanting to talk to someone older with Asperger's bevcause I'm very worried about my future. Could you give a broad overview of how life has been? I'm really interested to know because - as I said - I'm very worried about my future.


I've already dismissed alcohol as a way out. I haven't had a drop for about 3 years now. Admittedly, I did drink to excess.


Thanks.
Kevin

Well, when I was 8 my parents took me to a clinic in Nottingham, where I was left in a play room behind a two way mirror. I had no idea at the time, but I found out a few years later that I was diagnosed with AS by a doctor there. I think she was called Dr Newsome or something like that.

When I was younger I had an IQ of about 170 and was very good at virtually everything at school except sport. I did not enjoy sport and I was no good at it anyway, but I was very good at mathematics and sciences, and spelling and grammar, although I did not like writing long essays. I only had to look at a word once and I'd remember how to spell it. I was not very good at making friends, though, and apparently (although it seems hard for me to believe this now, looking back) I could not understand facial expressions or body language, or understand how others felt - all of which seems obvious to me now!

I saw a psychologist a few times while I was around 9-11 or so, and I don't really remember much about it except he showed me pictures of people with facial expressions, and asked me what I thought they were feeling, etc. When I got older, around 16+, I got much better at making and keeping friends etc, I was still very good at school but not so much the essay subjects (history, geography, English etc) and got good grades (mostly As / A*). I still hated sport, and still do!

I did get a bit of bullying but nothing too bad, as I suppose I was a bit weird when I was younger, but only in an eccentric sort of way. I'd say my IQ is probably not as high now due to having not done very much over the last couple of years, and over indulging on things I shouldn't have. I'm not working at the moment, but I make money playing fruit machines for a living. I think the AS and my natural ability with computers helps me here - I feel in tune with the machines, I know how they work and what's going to happen next. In fact, I was talking from age 2 and reading quite well from age 3, and the reading was helped along because my dad played on the computer with me and taught me to read off the computer screen!

Anyway, back to the point, any weirdness I might have had in the past has pretty much gone now. As I say, it seems strange that in the past I might not have understood things like body language and facial expressions - it's natural to me now! I am a little bit clumsy though. I'd say the ONLY AS-related problem I'm having at the moment is that as I was not so good with people in the past, and didn't have any relationships until I was 18, I am not too good at relationships and I'm certainly not very good at chatting girls up, but I think this will improve as I do it more. I have had a few girlfriends and have had sex several times.

I was at University but I didn't last the course. The problem was I had a girlfriend back in Buxton who I kept coming back to see every weekend and it interfered with my course. When we split up, I was depressed for a few weeks and didn't go to lectures or anything - I locked myself in my bedroom and didn't go out. I then failed the first year and dropped out, and have been loafing about ever since. I'm intending to go back soon when I've stopped over-indulging and sorted myself out, but instead of Maths I think I'll do computing. I found Maths natural, easy and obvious up to early A-level, and I never had to revise for exams, but after that it got more theoretical (more formulas to learn etc.) so as I hadn't had to revise in the past, I found it very difficult to start then, and didn't do as well as I should have at University. Hence I think Computer Science will be better for me.

I'd say if you're at all like me, you'll have no major problems in the future. I think I have grown out of any problems I might have had. If there's anything else you'd like me to tell you, just ask. Do you have any other questions?

Cheers,

Matt

avengah wrote:I'd say if you're at all like me, you'll have no major problems in the future. I think I have grown out of any problems I might have had. If there's anything else you'd like me to tell you, just ask. Do you have any other questions?

Cheers,

Matt

Your story is actually very similar to my life so far - I'm 23 now. Oh yeh, I did three years of a Computer Science degree straight-after leaving school but I'm doing Applied Biology now. I will be going back to do my last year of the Computer Science course after the Biology course finishes (this year). I think you're right though - CS suits people like us. There is a fair bit of maths in it and you need a good 'visualising' brain for when writing code.


Kevin.