My ex has Aspergers

Please [color=darkblue]help[/color]!

I was dating a boy with Aspergers Syndrome for a year. I loved him, but I had to break-up with him.

I couldn't handle his aspergers. I know it's weak of me, but he was never willing to change for me, and he was blind to the changes I'd made for him.

It's been two months since the break-up, but he can't cope with the loss. It's killing him. I will always love him, but I've had to move on. If he doesn't move on soon, I know something drastic will happen.

I've tried consoling him. I've tried ignoring him. There aren't many options left. But it's destroying me too. Please [color=brown]help[/color]!

Help? How?

Are you hoping there's some miracle salve for break-ups? There isn't. It doesn't get easier simply because one person has AS.


Surprise, surprise, an Aspie found it difficult to impossible to change to fit into your niche.

But the bottom line is that it doesn't matter in the slightest who's got AS and who doesn't. Breaking up is painful unless you're completely lacking in the ability to form relationships, and whether someone's got AS or not they're going to have (and need) to learn to cope with this kind of thing.


You can't save someone else, especially if you just dumped them. For god's sake, leave the poor kid alone and don't try to "help" him. You'll only make matters worse if you're trying to be a comfort to him. A clean break is a billion times easier, particularly if one person isn't highly adept socially.

yeah, i agree, a clean break is best...sounds like you are guilt-tripping yourself, why? and yeah, i don't think people, well, adults, especially, are able to change...so i guess it's a case of take 'em leave 'em....but, at least he had an ....ahem...excuse (or should i say reason)...my ex- does not have aspergers and he too was unwilling to change...oh well!

re: above post. i meant "adults" with Aspergers